“What Happened to the Family?”

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Foreign. [00:00:12] Speaker B: What it do, man? Listen, welcome to the Kimi pod, and I'm your host, B. [00:00:17] Speaker A: And I'm cue to Don. [00:00:18] Speaker B: Yes, sir. Man, listen, we got a. A long one up ahead. But first, before I get into anything, man, listen, I miss y'. [00:00:25] Speaker A: All. [00:00:25] Speaker B: Y' all miss us. Been a couple weeks, man. Happy belated Thanksgiving to all the people out there, man. And listen, I think we got a real one. I don't know what we're gonna be talking about, but we gonna rock with it, though. [00:00:41] Speaker A: Yeah, man, let me tell you something. And speaking of Thanksgiving, I think I might have told y' all this in the group chat, but I really didn't go into details. I know you sent your. The picture, something that you was cooking. [00:00:52] Speaker B: Yeah, but. [00:00:53] Speaker A: But I got to tell about my little mishaps. [00:00:56] Speaker B: Talk about it, man. [00:00:57] Speaker A: I went to the store for one. I said I was gonna cook a chicken, and I actually forgot that I said that. So I think it was on a Wednesday. My girl was like, hey, are you still cooking a chicken or what? I need to know. So I'm like, all right, cool. I wait till the last minute. Of course, Thanksgiving is on a Thursday. I go on a Wednesday, I get the chicken. All right. You know, I'm about to brine it. I'm about to do it. I'm grilling it. So I'm a grill it. So I didn't look at it. I didn't really look at the chicken. I looked at it, and I was like, dang, this chicken must have got kind of bruised up a little bit. Like, it was kind of beat up a little bit. So I get home, I'm prepping it. When I take it outta pack, it kinda stank a little bit. She was like, I don't think you should use that. You know me, that man. Pride. Yeah, I got it. Don't start trying to micromanage me. I got it. [00:01:43] Speaker B: Right, right. [00:01:43] Speaker A: She said, all right, I'm gonna let you have it, man. So I bore the brine up. I get everything going. Get the chicken in there. So I wake up the next morning, Thanksgiving Day, man. Took the chicken out of the brine. Still kind of smelling a little funky, a little funny, but I'm like, it's all right. So, man, I spatch cock. You know, that's for y' all that don't know. Spatchcocking is when you taking the backbone out and you gonna lay it, you gonna press it flat. So, boom, I pressed the flat, you know, got out, injecting out, doing all the good After a while, it started kind of smelling. The aroma started, you know, smelling a little something. Doing a little something, man. Got the grill ready, bro. I don't know what happened, bro. I put the chicken on the grill. Everything going well, and I'm documenting my whole journey. Cause I'm ready to tell people and show people, like, yeah, I really do this in the kitchen, bro. I get to cooking. All right, cool. Let it stay up there an hour. I cut the skin a little bit. Kind of tough. I'm like, all right, let me let it cook some more. Ended up. Long story short, it kept on letting it cook, bro. When I'm thinking it's done, the temperature said 180, right? I had a thermometer probe in there. It said 180. So when I pulled it out, like. Like, little juice started flowing. I said, oh, yeah, yeah, we cooking, bro. Take it in the house, you know, Put it in the full. Took it in the house. Let it rest a little while, man. Tell me why I cut in this chicken and the chicken looked like it got a period, bro. The chicken looked like it got a period, dog. Like. Like how cold junk was on Martin, bro. Ended up throwing the whole. Because when I cut the chicken, if the chicken felt kind of, like rubbery to the touch, yeah. I said, bro, I don't know if this was a bad. I'm blaming it on the chicken. It wasn't me, right? Because everything I. It must have been a hen. It couldn't have just been a regular chicken, because it wasn't me. [00:03:31] Speaker B: But, bro, the chicken had a whole period. Yeah, bro. [00:03:35] Speaker A: I'm gonna tell you the truth, dog. [00:03:36] Speaker B: Oh. [00:03:37] Speaker A: End of the day, ended up having to throw the whole chicken away. [00:03:40] Speaker B: Shoulda listen to the old lady, man. [00:03:42] Speaker A: I should've. But you know how we do as men, we know everything, but other than that, man, stuff been going pretty well. Can't complain. How's stuff been on your end, man? [00:03:55] Speaker B: Man, listen, I already doing before Thanksgiving, I put up my Christmas lights and everything else. [00:04:03] Speaker A: You ahead of schedule? [00:04:03] Speaker B: Yeah, I got that out the way. And then. Hold on. [00:04:07] Speaker A: Did you put up the lights or did your wife put up the lights? [00:04:09] Speaker B: I put up the tree and the lights. All the lights, you know, on the house and everything. [00:04:14] Speaker A: Oh, you different. [00:04:15] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:04:15] Speaker A: Yeah, you different. [00:04:16] Speaker B: I mean, I've been doing it for a couple, you know, a couple years straight, and then on Thanksgiving Day, man, this is the highlight of my Thanksgiving, man. Like, it just. It's this group called Table 1 out of Florence, and. And me and my Family been doing this for three years straight, man. Getting up early in the morning on Thanksgiving Day and going to feed the homeless. [00:04:39] Speaker A: Oh, man, that's a blessing. [00:04:40] Speaker B: Listen, that. That's a blessing. And after we got finished, so they were serving food from 11 to 1, and so we pick 11 o' clock so we can kind of, you know, get it out the way for, you know, for Thanksgiving. But we did 11 to 12. And then after we did that, you know what I'm saying? You know, you. You can eat along with the people. You know what I'm saying, Man, listen, within that hour, literally, man, I think we end up feeding within that hour, man, like a hundred people. Oh, that's within an hour. And I had my whole family doing. My daughter, my son, My son, he didn't want to do it. So, you know. Cause he was like, he ain't want to be around, like homeless people or something like that. [00:05:19] Speaker A: Oh, wow. [00:05:19] Speaker B: You know what I'm saying? So I made him do it. [00:05:22] Speaker A: I think that's good though, man, that build up. Cause I don't think a lot of kids. Cause maybe we didn't understand it either. So I'm not gonna be too hard on them. But a lot of kids and a lot of people in general don't understand, like, the fortunes that we have. And I think sometimes a lot of the stuff go get taken for granted, like just, you know, to have the use and activities of your limbs, for one, is one thing. But to have a roof, to have food that you can choose to eat, if you choose not to eat it, you don't have to eat it because you got something else. But there are some people in this world that we ride by every day that don't have those luxuries, that don't have those benefits. So I think for you as a dad, like, for you to be able to show your son that is a brilliant thing. Cause they need to see that. They need to see the other side of life when, you know, they don't understand it. [00:06:07] Speaker B: They don't. You know what I'm saying? Like how somebody can be like homeless or something like that. Majority of the homeless people that we did kind of encounter, man, like, you can tell they had some mental issues going on, right? And the other part, just, you know, maybe it may be a small handful of people just like, hey, listen, I'm just. I just want to be homeless. But, like, majority of them, like, had some type of mental illness. And, you know, we got a chance to feed them, got a chance to kind of eat with them, and you know what I'm saying? And that felt like a family, you know what I'm saying? We was their family. The people in the community that fed them was their family. Their family. Got a chance to talk with them, like, you know. You know, I don't know how it feel to be homeless, but, like, you know, when you kind of drive by people and they just be, like, sleeping on the sidewalk, people have this thing, like, you know what I'm saying? They look down on them, you know what I'm saying? And, you know, I guess for them, if I can imagine being in that position, you know what I'm saying? The first time people didn't look down on them and just fed them and ate with them and see how the day was. [00:07:14] Speaker A: It's crazy you say that, man. I told y'. All. But I had an opportunity to help out with a group in Darlington. I think it's DC3, along with a couple other of their partners, CareSouth, Genesis. I just want to name those few we gave out over 2,000 dinners. But to your point, man, to be out there, man, that was the great. That was so fulfilling, man. That was the greatest. That's one of the greatest acts of servitude I've ever done, man. And that jump was so. It was so fulfilling because as believers, as upstanding people, your job ain't always to get, get, get, get. Your job is actually servitude. Your job is to serve others, man, and to have that opportunity. I really felt blessed by that. And that's not something that we had to do. That's something that I've always told myself, even when I was younger. Like, man, when I get a chance, I'm going to go help out where I can. And then as far as, like, you saying the people and how they were treated, you can tell. I could. Well, myself, I could tell when I was out there. They're used to being looked at a certain way. They're used to being treated a certain way. The instructions for the volunteers were, if they come here, man, feed them. We not trying to hold no dinners back. Whoever come, feed them. So me personally once giving that charge, I was like, you know, if you come here asking for two plates and you got three, four kids with you, you sure you don't want more? You can tell they're so used to being frowned upon and so looked down on that they like, well, I just want to. Nah, it's here for the taking. Like, if you want it, get it. So, man, just. Just understanding that it's people that's going through that. And then to be frowned upon when you actually in those places where people supposed to be having servitude, to be able to bring the spirit that God has placed in me of being a servant and actually lifting up people and enjoying, like, enjoying just fellowship, man, that. Man, when I tell you that was a great feeling, man, and like yourself, man, shout out to y' all for that, because that's not something that. That's not something that you or I had to do. But it's just. It was placed on our heart to do it, and we did it. And this aside, bro, this ain't got nothing to do with what we talking about. Where you get that scarf from, dog? That scarf is hard. [00:09:27] Speaker B: Hey, listen, man, I got it from. I actually ordered it, man. It was, like, some years ago, bro. That jumped too hard, man. Listen, I appreciate it. No, let's highlight that jacket you got on, man. [00:09:39] Speaker A: Sheen. Sheen. Hey, Sheen, bro. [00:09:43] Speaker B: Oh, man, I'm a Sheen fanatic. Okay. What? Boohoo, men. [00:09:48] Speaker A: Yup. [00:09:49] Speaker B: Listen, I got this jean jacket, man. Listen, boy, I had that Jean jacket for, let me see, about five, six years, man. And you would think, Sutton. So I ain't even gonna lie. So cost efficient. I'm gonna put it in that way. Cost efficient. You would think it won't last that long, but, man, that's actually some good quality clothes that last long. Now, I ain't gonna lie. I normally don't wash my clothes. Certain level of clothes I put in the cleaners. [00:10:16] Speaker A: But, see, that's the thing with clothes. That's that a lot of people don't really get. They don't really. That's the part that they don't get, because they'll buy something from somewhere with clear wash instructions on it, and they go against the grain and machine wash everything and wash it with all your other clothes. [00:10:31] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:10:32] Speaker A: If I'm telling you to wash me a certain way and you choose to wash me the way that you want to wash me, once it mess up, it ain't really on the company. It's on yourself. Especially when you're dealing with cheaper materials, more. More delicate material. And just in that line, period, just fashion in general, man, I appreciate all the new stuff that we got. Cause, man, men pricing for our clothes, like, at the big box stores is through the roof, man. I appreciate the sheens and all that stuff, man. You could look dapper like ourselves for a better price, man, because it shouldn't break the bank for us to look pretty Decent. Hey, listen fellas, don't knock it till you try it, bro. [00:11:11] Speaker B: No, no, she. Well, I mean these young guys on this exotic and this. [00:11:17] Speaker A: Hey, maybe they got the bread for it. I'm gonna let them have it, man. [00:11:20] Speaker B: You know they ain't got. They man, they. I think they apple paying. Not apple paying, but what that afterpay. Klarna klarna. [00:11:28] Speaker A: And also too man, they got a site, I think it's dhgate that you can get anything that the celebrities get. They call them like replicas or dupes or something like that. You can get all that stuff for the low. Like. And I've always been like this. I do what I want to do. I don't do what the trend tell me to do. I don't do what the world say do. If they say air force one's out of style, if I want to wear some air force ones with what I got on, I'm going to do it. And like the people around me know some black forces. I was dealt with some black forces. [00:11:58] Speaker B: Every time I see somebody with some black forces, I think about Desi Banks. [00:12:03] Speaker A: Oh yeah, he be killing them jokes, bro. He be killing that. [00:12:05] Speaker B: I be like, boy, they on that black air force energy. [00:12:08] Speaker A: Yeah, man. I walked in the, I worked with some black forces on one day, they said, you mad? You okay? Yeah, I was like, bro, I'm good, I'm good, I'm good. [00:12:17] Speaker B: Black air force ones. But I ain't gonna lie. Like back in the day, people who used to wear them black air force ones and it was bent up in the front, they tend to be the kids that used to get in trouble that iss But I'm gonna tell you. [00:12:31] Speaker A: Though, the one thing about forces though. Forces are not meant to be no years long shoes or no year long shoes. [00:12:37] Speaker B: It ain't. [00:12:38] Speaker A: Once they start creasing at the toe, you got to let em go. You gotta let em go. Cause especially with them black ones, when folks see you with black force, they already got something in their mind. If they creased at the end and start taking a position of your toe. [00:12:51] Speaker B: They didn't turn into like, you know, on cook shoes. [00:12:55] Speaker A: Yo, yo, yo, yo. [00:12:57] Speaker B: Yeah, they turn into cook shoes. Now they cook shoes on. But dang, man, that was a good rest. Now it came back to me where I got this from. Wow. This is a website called wow. This guy that I had fathered some years ago, man, that he be. They call him the Tarzan or something like that. [00:13:16] Speaker A: Okay. [00:13:16] Speaker B: And he had, you know, he started off with this, which Made me want to look into getting my own crown, you know what I'm saying? To put over my head. So that's something that I probably might have in the works coming in the future, though. [00:13:28] Speaker A: Okay. [00:13:28] Speaker B: Like, scarves like this and trying. [00:13:30] Speaker A: I'm definitely. I'm gonna get on that. Yeah. So what we got? [00:13:34] Speaker B: What we got today, man? [00:13:35] Speaker A: What we got today, man? Earlier this week. Y' all gonna see me look at my phone. Cause the print is small. Earlier this week, man, I kind of had a thought, and it was about family. About, you know, the family structure and how things going with us now. Like, you know, it used to be a time where on Sundays, you knew, like, that was everybody going. Well, I could speak for my family. We knew that we were going to grandma house. My grandma had 10, 11 kids. So, you know, all the kids would be over there, the cousins. You know, if somebody riding by on the street, you couldn't hardly get on the street. But, you know, if you go on that street, then you gotta stop by Ms. Meyers and Mr. Myers house. You about to eat with us. Like, everybody was one big family. And I'm trying to figure out, at what point did that go wrong? Like, at what point did we get away from that? Because I feel like that's kind of led to some. I gotta watch how I say this. That's led to some mental illnesses as well, like depression, like it used. It's hard for me to explain what I'm trying to say, but it's like when you used to be around your family. And I know we were younger, but, like, bro, those times felt the best. Like, a lot of stuff didn't really matter when you was with your cousins, when you with your aunts, your uncles. Like, my family, we sing, we come. I come from a singing family. We sing and we joke, and we just having fun now. It's like everything is so solidarity. It's just you, your kids, and your partner, and it's just kind of like the family aspect is gone now. [00:15:04] Speaker B: The cornerstone had died off. [00:15:07] Speaker A: That's true. But in my family, even before that, man, we started kind of, like, spreading out. And I'm trying to figure out, like, where we went wrong, bro. And that's a real question that I have. Like, and if you look at a lot of younger people, like social medias, they make this little joke. Like, when they see a video of a family doing something, they be like, oh, let me be y' all cousin. Like, let me join y' all family. I think that's a longing that we still have because that's what we grew up on. And now it's like to get the family to do anything, it's got to. It's like pulling teeth, bro. And we have a great time when we together. But I just don't know where we went wrong in society as to like family time and that actually being a staple of our community. [00:15:51] Speaker B: Well, I can't hold it, I guess for me, man, like, you know, that's. Which is a good question, man. Just growing up, always felt, I don't know, for some odd reason, safe when I'm around my loved ones, my grandma, everybody. I guess it represent, you know what I'm saying? Well, for me, being safe, feeling love around my, like for not everybody, but like my grandma was that cornerstone for me, you know what I'm saying? And everybody used to come to her house for everything because my grandma was a very loving woman. She'll help anybody, you know what I'm saying? I guess from the lens of a child, like, you know what I'm saying? Me seeing her from that perspective. But I guess as she died off, you know what I'm saying, I realized like people still had like issues, you know what I'm saying? Like, you know, my aunts and stuff like that. They still had their own mental issues that they was dealing with. Failed marriages and all these other stuff. Like I couldn't really see. I couldn't really see some of that stuff from a child perspective because I was thinking of a child. But all them symptoms was there. It just was missed as a child, as I. I kind of got older, you know what I'm saying? And my grandma ended up passing away. And then I kind of understand certain things. Just realized like people really had, you know what I'm saying, they own personal issues and they just couldn't get past. And my grandma was that look that like I said, cornerstone, that person in the middle that kind of helped them navigate life a little bit, you know what I'm saying? But grandma was really, in my opinion, my grandma was a person that was giving people wisdom and everything else, but they, in a sense they was using her to just kind of. She didn't. She. Not on purpose enabling them, but you know what I'm saying, they were just going to her just because as a pacifier in a sense, you know what I'm saying? If you think about it. But when she passed away, you know what I'm saying, they ain't had nobody else to go to, you know what I'm saying? And Then it was wrapped up in their own little issues or they own personal life, man. And it's just so much stuff, dog. Like I can kind of talk about. I got an aunt that passed away, you know what I'm saying? Her, you know, growing up, man, I just, you know, man, she could cook, man. She was so talented, bro. She could cook anything that you wanted her to cook, man. But you know, I guess when she end up, when my grandma passed away, my grandma used to keep her kids, you know what I'm saying, while she was with her, you know what I'm saying? Her boyfriend, her baby daddy, so to speak, man. And in my opinion, she ain't really had a, you know what I'm saying, a real relationship with her kids personally. But it was a lot of things going on with that and some things she just couldn't shake and she, she was wrapped up in her own personal life. My mama was wrapped up in her own personal life. My uncles was wrapped up in their own personal life, what was going on. And that one person that we used to go to that house, you know what I'm saying, during holidays and stuff like that, she was already. She passed away. So everybody was just kind of wrapped up in their own thing. [00:19:11] Speaker A: So basically, like. I can agree. So basically when the glue is gone, everything just kind of like fall apart. [00:19:18] Speaker B: Yeah, everything. Yeah, everything fall apart. And now I kind of see myself now at my age being that person, even though I, you know, everybody could have everything, you know, a lot of stuff going on. But now I find myself in the place with my family, trying to be that glue, trying to get everybody connected, man. Listen, like now more so where I think about it from my grandma's shoes, man, that's a lot, yo, you know what I'm saying? To have that mantle to make sure all the families straight, Everybody, you know what I'm saying? [00:19:51] Speaker A: Straight. Yeah, that's tough. [00:19:53] Speaker B: And you have a level of concern the things that they going on sometimes, you know what I'm saying? You neglect your own personal self, which I find out that certain things about her she neglected because she took on everybody else problems in a sense. [00:20:07] Speaker A: I definitely agree with that, man. You know, to me, like you said, trying. And I'm on myself hard about that. And I've been on my, especially this week, like simple stuff like picking up the phone, hey man, I'm just checking on you because we've gotten to the point now where everything is a group message. Everything is us sending the video, everything is us sending the text, like actually Picking up the phone, check on people. Like, how you doing? Like, I ain't called to talk long. Just came to, like, checking on you. Called to check on you or just going by to the people that's close, like, hey, I'm just coming to pull up on you real quick. I ain't came to stay, like. Cause, man, it get to a point where everybody's so busy. And I'm talking about myself, too. Everybody's so busy. Everybody got everything in the world going on. But, like, are we really that busy, or we just got to the point where we don't have that glue no more. So nobody's picking up the mantle of being the glue, because, like you said, that's a hard thing. And just on that, like, for the Fourth of July, okay, so when we were growing up, we just came to grandma house. We never knew the preparation to get to grandma house. We never knew the strings that had to be pulled to get to grandma house. When we were kids, all we did was showed up and everything was done. So there was nobody to ever teach us, like, hey, man, when we putting together a cookout, when we putting together this, this is. We never was taught that. So we just always had the mentality of when you get the call, you just show up. So if everybody got that mentality of when you get the call, you just show up. Who's planning? So I think it seems small, but that small, minute detail changed the trajectory because nobody's planning. Nobody's actually planning the functions. Everybody. Most people will show up to the function. [00:21:47] Speaker B: It takes a lot to plan when. [00:21:49] Speaker A: Nobody'S planning the function. So, okay, so for the 4th of July, I had that on me. I was like, yo, we can't keep on. The older people, the aunts, the uncles, they've done what they had to do. They've set the foundation. Grandma, they set the foundation. It's on the younger generation to move it forward and to keep it going and to bring it back. So what I did was I reached out to a few of my cousins. I'm like, yo, I need y'. [00:22:13] Speaker B: All. [00:22:13] Speaker A: I had a thought, man. You know, kind of wanting to get our family together like we used to. Everybody was down with it. Everybody was in agreeance, man. They made it very smooth sailing. Shout out to all my cousins. And we told our aunts, my mom and them. We was like, hey, y', all, just come. Y' all don't gotta pay nothing. So we asked for a little bit of money from everybody. So nobody had a, like, overly give. And if you didn't have money, man. We wanted everybody to contribute. Of course, anytime when you're doing something like that, somebody's gonna give more, somebody's gonna give less, and it's cool. I'm one of those type of people, bro. Once the Food Ball, I don't care if you didn't send a dollar, bro, come eat. Your family. I've never cared about, like. Cause if need be, you can get my plate and I eat when I leave here. I just want to be in your fellowship. [00:22:55] Speaker B: Fourth of July. [00:22:56] Speaker A: Fourth of July. Nah, the one that just passed. That's what we did. We got everybody together, man. Man, had cousins get fireworks. Like, bro, that was crazy. The feeling was so. Bro, it's almost unexplainable. Like, we haven't had a moment like that in so long, bro. Like, for everybody to just be in there. Just, like, at one point in time. I ain't gonna even lie to you. I got really emotional, and I really kind of wanted to cry a little bit. Like, bro, it's been a long time since we did that, bro. And you could get love from your homies, from your lady, from your friends and all that, but, man, that family love, that family dynamic, when it's pure and genuine. Like I said, none of us don't be beefing, bro. It's just, for whatever reason, we just can't get it together. But, man, that Fourth of July, man, that was one for the books, man. Our fireworks show lasted. Shout out to my cousin Daniel for this one. Cause, man, our fireworks show lasted at least 10, 15 minutes, man. I'm talking about big boys, too, man. Lit the whole scout, but, man, just getting everybody together. But to the main point, somebody has to take that mental. Somebody has to take that initiative to keep it going, man. And I think that's. That's. [00:24:13] Speaker B: To me, that somebody get everybody together. [00:24:15] Speaker A: Yeah, that's kind of what we fell off at, man. I ain't gonna lie to you. Like, somebody just picking up the mantle. Cause like I said, we just used to showing up. But somebody got to be in the planning stages. Somebody got to put the thing together for people to have something to show up, too, man. So that's what I really been kind of, like, trying to get better with, man. Just the whole family dynamic in general. [00:24:33] Speaker B: It's something that you had said earlier, man. I want to go back to. Because I read something on social media. This lady I used to work with, engineer I used to work with, man, she post something about her. I guess her mom. Her mom used To, I guess because her life was so busy doing what she was doing. Her mom used to. Well, not used to, but one day her mom told her to come to the house, she needed to go grocery shopping. And you know what I'm saying, she was like, okay, I go to the grocery store. I come there to take you to grocery shopping. When she got there, you know, her moms had a list on the table with her groceries. And she was like, mom, I see you got some bags, right, with stuff in it. And then she look at the last part on the list. It was like company. And that junk just hit her was like, her mom actually called her to take her grocery shopping. But really she didn't want to go grocery shopping. She just want her to come to the house. And that junk had hit me because my uncle, my mom's brother, you know, is my mom's only sibling that's living. And he's the one person. When I was growing up, my mom had me when she was like 18 years old. So I grew up in a house full of my aunts and my uncles. And he was one of the first person that, you know what I'm saying? You know, my uncle, he represent my grandma, my family, like, you know, when I was younger. And so, you know, right now, you know, he kind of having a little tough time, but he getting a little better. And he always, like, this week right here, he was like, brandon, why don't you come by the house, man? Like, you know, can you take me grocery shopping? And just so happened I read that, you know what I'm saying, that post, man, and it just made me thought, like, unc, really, just really want to have some company, man, because all his kids, like, in different states right now and four, three hours away from where he at. And like, the real family around here is like, me and my siblings and my moms and them. But like, the thing is, like, when I did took him grocery shopping, man, and I took him back to the house, and we sat in the living room, man, just laughing and talking about, you know, I'm literally, man, like, for three hours straight, just laughing and talking about, you know what I'm saying, back in the day. And that junk just had reminded me, man, like what you said. Sometimes we just not only call people, but we just have to sometimes pull up on them and just check in on. Especially the elderly man. Sometimes, boy, sometimes we get so busy would not, you know what I'm saying, with life. And sometimes, like, we don't never think about the elderly, man. Like, as they get older, their peers then already pass away. Their siblings then pass away. And the young kids that they grandkids and kids, they got their own little life, man, and nobody will never come and visit them, Right? Like, that gotta be a lonely feeling, man. Like. And sometimes you forget that at some point in time in your life, man, if God's willing, if this God will. For your life to live longer, which it is, then we one day gonna be in that same position with our own kids, our own peers, and you just gonna realize, like, there ain't nobody coming to check in on us. [00:27:55] Speaker A: Exactly, man. And then, like, you another thing too, man. These same people play pivotal parts in your life. Yeah. Like, so what a feeling that must be. Cause I remember, like you said, man, I remember talking to my granddaddy one day. We was outside, he was like, kalaa. All his grandson. Grandson, man, I ain't getting emotional now, but, man, when me and my granddaddy used to talk, man, bro, my granddad, he getting tears going quick, man. We sitting outside one day, man. He was sitting on this little walker thing. He was like, grandson, I want to tell you something. He said, man, I appreciate you for coming by, man. You come check on the old man. You sit with the old man. And sometimes I just be wanting somebody to talk to. And I was like, dang, brother, be that old to have your. Like, a lot of your people don't come by and check on you no more. A lot of people that you deposited a lot of stuff in and for the end of your life for these same people not to even give you five minutes of their time. So it. [00:28:51] Speaker B: And it don't be personal either, man. [00:28:53] Speaker A: It's not personal. It's not personal at all, man. But you get so tied up and so busy in life, but we got to stop getting so tied up and so busy that we don't do that, man. That's not saying I'm tied up all the time is not a good excuse, bro. [00:29:07] Speaker B: It ain't. [00:29:07] Speaker A: And I'm preaching to myself, I agree. If this ain't for nobody else, bro, this for me. Telling myself that I'm busy all the time is a lie, dog. And I'm just being honest. That's a lie. I'm not that busy that I can't go by and see the folks that deposited in my life, man. So I really need to get better with that, because, man, it's a guilty feeling for somebody to pass on, and you really gotta sit up there like, yo, I coulda. I shoulda. [00:29:36] Speaker B: But not. And I hate. Listen, y', all, I hate to change such. I'm not gonna change such on purpose. [00:29:43] Speaker A: You good, bro. [00:29:44] Speaker B: But I just thought about something, man, because a lot of people don't have that type or grew up in a family that they love. Like, I ain't even gonna fake, man. I got somebody in my family that really hate the family, you know what I'm saying? And, you know, some stuff transpired over Thanksgiving, and I, you know, I spare y' all the detail because it's real messy and it's real ratchet, you know what I'm saying? [00:30:10] Speaker A: But we all got that. We all go through it. [00:30:13] Speaker B: But, you know, personally, man, like, you know, it's people out there that really can't stand family, been burnt by family, and just don't like nothing about their family, you know what I'm saying? And you know what you say to them people, man, because they don't feel the same way that we feel when we think about family. Maybe they got one or two people in the family that they lock in with, you know what I'm saying? But other than that, like, they don't really, you know, as a whole, you know what I'm saying? They ain't really felt the genuineness, the genuine love, man, of family, you know what I'm saying? Because I truly think that a lot of things that we didn't address growing up was swept under the rug, and. And that rug turned into a mountain. And to the point where as you get older, like, you gotta kinda pull the rug up, because now you see up underneath that, people been sweeping up under the rug, and now it's more bigger than what it is, and it's hard to fix that, you know what I'm saying? Which, you know, people have to go to therapy, go to counseling, you know what I'm saying? To just. To just get past certain things. So what, you know, what's your advice on for people like that, man? Because it's. A lot of people out here don't feel how we feel about family, okay? [00:31:30] Speaker A: So for that, I'm gonna be honest with you. That's kind of. [00:31:34] Speaker B: I'm not gonna put you on the spot. [00:31:36] Speaker A: No, no, no. You good, bro. I like this. Not trying to be Luder, their situation. I can't really tell them how to feel about their family. But what I will say about that is forgiveness is a hard thing. Forgiveness is something that your flesh don't want to do, but forgiveness ain't for somebody else. Forgiveness is for yourself. It's very hard to forgive people. I know it is, and it's easier said than done. But forgiveness allows somebody to walk in a room with you that you once hated, that you can still coexist in that room with that person. But that does not mean that you have to have dealings with that person on that same level anymore. And I think a lot of times what church people do and what people do is they'll tell you forgiveness and they make you feel bad for not allowing that person in your space like they once had the opportunity to be in your space. You can forgive people, but you don't have to forget what they did. But you don't have to act out that stuff either. And my thing would be go seek some therapy, go get some help, pray about this thing. Like, really go to the root of the problem, whatever that may be, and really try to get that thing out of your system. Because like I said, it is hard to live a life of unforgiveness. Because if you live a life of unforgiveness, that means somebody can walk in a room that has done something to you. And because that person is in the room, you could have been having a great day. But because that person walked in the room, you now have to end your fun to leave that place. Because. Because that person walked in the room, that is a lot of power over your life. And the stuff that you give power over your life is going to keep on holding you down. Forgiveness is for yourself. It's not for nobody else. Start with that. But pray. Pray about it and seek answers like godly answers, like, lord, how do I get over this? Like, do the work to actually get over. Because what you find a lot of times is people will have things like that going on, but they're not doing the work to try to better that. I'm not saying you ever have to sit around your family and fake it till you make it. If you can't do it right now, that's understandable. Give yourself the grace to understand. Like, I'm not there yet. I can't sit around these people. And that's okay. But don't just sit up there and let that become your life story. Work to actually get past this stuff. Because life is precious. And if I'm going to spend my life sitting up here mad with somebody to the fact of every time they walk in a room, every time they get by me, let's say me and you right now, we having a good time. Somebody walking here that did something to me that I ain't forgiven yet. I now gotta take these headphones off, I gotta end this whole thing. Cause I can't even be in the room with them. [00:34:10] Speaker B: You done shut down. [00:34:11] Speaker A: I done shut down. That ain't affecting them. Cause a lot of times they don't even know they did nothing to you. They don't care that they did something to you. [00:34:17] Speaker B: Hey, let's. [00:34:18] Speaker A: That's on you. [00:34:19] Speaker B: Hey, let's. Let's there. Cause I wanna stay right there. I wanna stay right there. Q, you said something, man. You said a lot of times that that person don't know that they offended you or they made you felt some type of way, man. Can you go a little more details. Let's go below the surface. Because a lot of times people thinking in their mind that other person that they mad at or they don't, you know what I'm saying? They don't, you know, that affected them in some type of way. A lot of times they going on throughout their life, man, not knowing that they did that. [00:34:57] Speaker A: And that's why the forgiveness part is so strong. But to that point, I may know I did something to you, but so much time has gone by that to me, in my mind, that doesn't even matter anymore. You're still holding that. But I'm living my life. And sometimes, like you said, I may do something to somebody that I figure is just a joke or just a little. But every time I see this person, I say the same little type of jokes. But in that person mind, whatever your reality is in your mind becomes your reality out here, right? Whatever that is in your mind, I can account for what you feel in your mind. I can't account for what your mind tells you. I can't account for that. So you may be mad with me. Like, man, every time I come around, man, I'm always the buddy. His jokes. I had a cousin one day, man, on some real John, I had a cousin, man. I'm the most jokiest person you know, right? Man, My cousin said one day, he said, I didn't even know he was mad with me. But they was like, yeah, man, he mad with you, bro. He said, you always making him the butt of your jokes. I said, what? I said, I joke on everybody. I said, I've joked on my mama. I joke on myself. I said, I joke about everything. I still apologize to him because whatever your perception, whatever your reality was in your mind, I was mad for a minute, though. I ain't saying it. Like, I just straight up went to him and apologized because I Didn't because I felt like he was being soft. But at the end of the day, whatever your mind told you was going on, I still apologize. Cause I offended him. I said, bro, that's never my intention. I never meant to make you feel like the butt of a joke. And if I ever did that to you, come to me as a man, bro. You don't have. Don't let me hear it from nobody else, bro. I'm approachable, bro. I'm not above reproach. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong. And I could in my mind not be wrong, but to you, what I'm doing is wrong, that's hurtful to you, let me know. That's why communication is always a big thing. I can't be accountable for the trauma that I'm causing you if I don't know I'm causing it, right? So speaking, man, like getting to that point where you could talk to somebody or talk about it, like I said. Cause sometimes we mad with folks and folks don't even know they did nothing to us. [00:36:58] Speaker B: It could be something deeper than that too, as well, man. Like, more and more I think about it, you know what I'm saying? Like, say Vincent, like, I'm. Like, I'mma use. I'm gonna use you, for instance, you said something about, man, man, you stupid, man. And they laugh, you know what I'm saying? Because some words could be triggers to people. And even though you ain't mean it like that, like going back to what you were saying, what my mind perceive it as, and a lot of times what my mind perceive it as, it taking me all the way back from when I was young. A lot of things that people feeling some type of way about it, it be underlining issues that never been tampered with, you know what I'm saying? That when somebody else says it, even though you know what I'm saying, like it could be a joke or just talking in general, it hitting a spot, you know what I'm saying? And ain't what I said. A lot of times I see that within my relationship, you know what I'm saying? Certain things I might say that I ain't even thinking on that level. But how my wife perceive it as, that's what she perceive it as. I'm like, hold up, you got offended by that. Like, I ain't mean no harm about that. And a lot of times it don't be personal to me though, you know what I'm saying? It be something that triggered her, that took her all the way back, it could be childhood. Most of the stuff that trigger people would be from childhood that, you know what I'm saying, they never had got past. And I just want to kind of throw that out there. A lot of times when people taking something personal, it could be something that triggered them, that take them back all the way from to their childhood that made them felt some type of way. [00:38:42] Speaker A: And to that point is back to the point that we said about the sacrifice and about time, what are you doing to actively get past that? Because everybody in the world can't walk on eggshells because you have stuff that's traumatic to you in your past. And I know that sounds very critical and very harsh, but at the end of the day, that's not my job to have to walk on eggshells. Because if I'm joking with you and you take that as something now, once you explain that to me, I know how to deal with you. But if this is our first dealing, do the work. It's a lot of people that just love to sit in their misery and that will love to have a story. Well, this triggers me. What are you doing for that not to be a trigger for you anymore? Like, because. And I'm going to be honest with you with this mental health stuff, and I'm very sympathetic about this, but I'm finding that a lot of people love to just soak in their misery and they're not doing the active work to try to get past this stuff. They love to have a story, they love this to be the attachment to them. And if you dealing with mental health, like I always say, go get help, join some groups, pray about it, get in your word, whatever you got to do to get past some of the stuff. But it's not everybody's job to walk on eggshells because you have traumatic experience. Because everybody's not going to know your past, everybody's not going to know your hurt that you've been through. And although you try to deal with people delicate, some things that you do with people is gonna just rub them the wrong way. And that's just life. But those people have to like. That's why I say, man, you gotta do the work. Cause I get sick of sometimes, and I'm just being honest, I get sick of even having to tailor, make every type of move with people because I don't know what's triggering to them. I've never been so sick of people being triggered by every little thing like I am now. Everything triggers somebody. [00:40:23] Speaker B: I think that's you know, because we. We make aware of so many things, man. Like, and that's. That's. I'm at the same place where you at. But when it comes down to, like, people being triggered and, and, you know, this mental health thing, a lot of times you don't really know how to deal with people or talk to them and, you know, without triggering them or. [00:40:44] Speaker A: Because, hold on. I'm sorry. Because like you said, it can be something simple and that you're joking about that You're. You're actually playful, having fun with somebody. You're thinking that they're receiving it, and whatever their perception telling them is not even nowhere near what you think. So now you got a whole out against me that you ain't even communicated with me. And I'm thinking we good. But something doesn't trigger you in your mind. Like, I'm not a mind reader. I'm not a mind regulator, bro. You. You. You got to do some work to try to get past some of the stuff. Like, everybody can't be the blame or the catalyst for your. For your. For your stuff. And we are, like I said again, we are very sympathetic to those who are dealing with mental. Mental battles, mental issues, because we all go through it. But at the end of the day, I'm personally not about to make everybody the catalyst for the stuff that I'm going through with some stuff I got to. Like, the Bible says every. I don't know if the Bible said this, but I think you say this. Everybody has to work out their own soul salvation. Everybody have to bear their own cross. You got to bury your cross. You got to go do the work. Because it ain't everybody's job in this world to not tread on your feelings. I'm sorry. That's just the way life is. [00:41:45] Speaker B: Hey, I keep thinking it made me think about this anime. Cause I'm a big anime person, man. I like anime. So I've been following One Punch Man. Matter of fact, the episode that came out season three for all the manga did for all the people, that's a big One Punch man fan. I am. You know what I'm saying? But you know, Santa Mar, and you know, he. [00:42:10] Speaker A: He. [00:42:11] Speaker B: He's appeared to be the good guy. Right? You know what I'm saying? And then you got Garo, which is, you know, he. He. He team up with the Monster Association. But, you know, both of them like heroes, right? One. One of them a bad guy. Garu is the bad guy. But more and more I think about is, man, like, the bad Guy or the person. For some odd reason, I always feel like, man, it's a mental discognitive thing when it comes down to they thinking because they end up, you know, they the same. The good guy and the bad guy seem like the same people. But the only difference is, is the people misunderstand the bad guy, you know what I'm saying? And a lot of times the reason why they be being misunderstand, understood is because, you know what I'm saying, the way they perceive things, you see what I'm saying? And it made me thought about that, especially over the holidays, man, like, you know, I got a family member that really think, you know, the family don't love them. And you know what I'm saying that you know, like, I mean, literally they say f family and stuff like that, man. And from what I see is, man, all the stuff that we didn't try. [00:43:25] Speaker A: To help you with, man, you got okay for that, bro. Perception is reality. But for two, there are people in the world. No matter how much help they get or how much help you offer, some people are going to have a victim mentality, bro. Some people are going to have a woe as me. It don't matter what you do, you could bend up. [00:43:44] Speaker B: That gotta be mental. [00:43:45] Speaker A: It's a mental thing. [00:43:46] Speaker B: Like how they like how they see the world, man. Like, like in my mind I'm thinking is they see the world like a certain way, man. That ain't like, you know how people with like dyslexic that, you know what I'm saying? You know when they read where they see a book, you know what I'm saying, they look a little different from people who is not dyslexic. And that's how I feel about people with that victim mentality, man. Like no matter what dog, they gonna see almost. And it tied to entitlement too. Cause they have a level of entitlement too. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. [00:44:18] Speaker A: And you gotta watch out for the spirit of offense, man, because you know, you got a lot of people who operate with that spirit. Anything you say, anything you do gonna offend them. And that at the end of the day, like, I'm not saying nobody's wrong or right in the situation because whatever your perception of reality, whatever your perception is, that's your reality. But at the end of the day, some people, no matter, man, this, this how you know it's true, right? I've seen online where people do good acts. They're not recording, somebody's recording them. Do you know, I would read those comments, and somebody's still gonna be offended by something that happened in that video. [00:44:50] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [00:44:51] Speaker A: So that lets you know right then and there, you can't please everybody. So trying to be a people pleaser, you'll run your head through a wall trying to do it, because some people gonna be offended, man. You could go fix your whole family a plate. Fix everybody food before you get yours. He just did this to show off. He think he better than us. So sometimes it's not gonna matter what you do. If somebody want to be offended, bro, they gonna be offended. [00:45:14] Speaker B: Hey, it's funny you mentioned about the plate thing. I seen somebody fits their husband food first and then fed the kids, and people was feeling some type of way about that. And I was thinking, man, like, literally, they got enough food to get all the kids. You know what I'm saying? Like. Like, bro, like, why. Why y' all arguing about this, man? [00:45:35] Speaker A: Somebody wanting to be offended. You want to be offended? Because at the end of the day, like you just said, I'm not even about to argue with somebody, whatever they're doing in their family, because obviously if that husband fool got fixed first, you have enough for everybody. [00:45:46] Speaker B: Yeah, you got enough for everybody, man. Come on. [00:45:49] Speaker A: You want to be offended? I'm not walking around looking to be offended. I can't really operate like that because I don't operate like that. I can understand it because I'm empathetic of people, but I also understand you have to do the work to try to get over that stuff. Basically, what I'm saying is, for the whole thing, what work are you doing to get over the hurdles that you're dealing with? Because everybody can be offended about something. I could be mad about a lot of stuff. That's what I choose to do. If I'm mad about everything, that's me having that mentality. What am I doing to work through that? Because everybody. And then what people do is this accountability. They don't like that because sometimes in situations, you did things or you do things to kind of perpetuate things and to get targets thrown at you. But a lot of people, they'll do what they do and try to act like, well, I don't know why they doing this to me. I don't know why, bro. So this stuff be like layers and layers and layers of stuff, bro. Cause you can take this conversation anyway, but at the end of the day, bro, everybody got to do their work. And then, like I said, so. [00:46:58] Speaker B: Q. Let me ask you a personal question. Man, What. Have you encountered something within family or, you know, I guess a misunderstanding with your family or any loved ones or just anything, period, that you really. You felt some type of way about and you had to address? [00:47:18] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, most definitely. I'm one of those type of people. Like, let's talk about it. Like, I'm one of them. I'm one of them. Like, let's talk about it and. [00:47:26] Speaker B: And talking about, like, now. Like, we talk about it now. Cause you got some people like, no, no, I think. [00:47:32] Speaker A: I think I'm that type of person. [00:47:34] Speaker B: I want to talk about now. [00:47:35] Speaker A: Nah. God has blessed me with the ability to be able to control my emotions pretty well and to understand timing. Timing is everything in certain discussions. Because if we're both heated, my message to you. And this. This is. This is where the offense thing could come in. Okay. What I'm gonna say to you when we're both calm might not translate the same as when we're both mad. It could be the very same words, but just the tone of my voice could change, and that changes the whole dynamic of our relationship. So there have been times where, like, I have a cousin that I feel like doing some flaw stuff. Like, as far as, like, just doing something flaw. And more than likely, I talked to one of my other cousins, and I be like, bro, blase, blase, blase. He be like, nah, bro, it ain't that. So me personally, hey, yo, the person that I got out with, hey, bro, I don't like the way you been. Blah, blah, blah. Nah, man. It's been. But we have the dialogue about it. But, like, man, I'm one of those dialogue people. Like, let's talk about it, bro. We ain't got to go through nobody else. We ain't need nobody to mediate because it ain't gonna get ugly to the point where we got to have mediation. But I'm one of those people. Like, let's get to it. Like, we ain't got to talk right then and there, but we ain't going. Cause I can't fake. That's one thing I can't do. I'm not a person that could be sitting around you and knowing I have an alt with you and be like, yeah, we good. I can't do that. So before we get back, cool. And we not beefing to the death. Cause we ain't did. Neither one of us ain't did nothing to each other that requires us to beef to the death. So we're gonna have that conversation before I kick it with you and act like we just buddy, buddy like we used to be. Nah, let's have this conversation. Cause I can't fake it, bro. [00:49:14] Speaker B: Is it in some situation you just don't. I mean, I guess in some situation, I guess you could bring it up, but sometimes it just seem like it ain't no need to. Like, where y' all at right now? [00:49:25] Speaker A: Nah, for me. [00:49:27] Speaker B: Think you should bring it up? [00:49:28] Speaker A: I have to for myself. Because that self awareness. We always talk about that self awareness. I know I have to. Because whether it do anything or not, the Bible says when you have an alt against your brother, you bring it to him. Whatever that person does with that alt, that has nothing to do with me. But if God come back for me and I die and I got a real thing with you, and I never try to get that right. The blood ain't on your hand. It's on my hand. So I think about stuff. Like, I know that's deep, and that's probably too deep, but that's the way I think about stuff. I got to get it off my hand. What you do with it is on you. If I bring it to you and you don't wanna clear it up. All right, cool. We ain't beefing or nothing, but I see where we stand. But it won't be said that I didn't at least try. [00:50:17] Speaker B: That's good. That's how I feel about. I had. Did something in a meeting, one of my meetings a couple weeks ago, and said something. I mean, I ain't saying nothing real bad, but it was out of. Out of turn. And I was like, man, that was wrong. After I left work. And then I text my manager, like, hey, listen, I apologize. That wasn't like me. I shouldn't have never done that in the meeting. Blah, blah, blah. Like, you know what I'm saying? I do that. If the Holy Spirit led me to, like, hey, listen, you was wrong. Cause the Holy Spirit do be tapping in with me. [00:50:50] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:50:50] Speaker B: That conviction be real when I be wrong. But what about. And it's just funny, though, man. Like, people that owe you money or something like that. And you see them. [00:51:00] Speaker A: Do you? [00:51:01] Speaker B: So you bring that up. Hey, man, you gonna. [00:51:04] Speaker A: That's something that I struggle with, bro. That's something that I struggle with. Even now. There's people that owe me money, and I see them doing stuff, and then. [00:51:12] Speaker B: You be like, hey, hey, bro, you think you gonna pay me more money? Is that the same thing, bro? [00:51:18] Speaker A: A lot of times, I don't know. [00:51:19] Speaker B: What you talking about. [00:51:19] Speaker A: A Lot of times it is, but a lot of times I won't say. [00:51:21] Speaker B: Nothing that'll make a family. Family members fall out by money. [00:51:26] Speaker A: But they will, they will. But for me, yeah, I look at it like this. My cousin always told me this. For one, you don't ever land what you can't afford to lose, you can't afford to lose. So if I lend it, I can afford to lose it. I don't want to lose it. And sometimes it's, it's at a detriment to me that I lost it. But. And if he, he told me this, he said if you loan somebody some, some money and they don't pay you back, you just paid that person to never be able to ask you for anything again. [00:51:54] Speaker B: Yeah, that's true. [00:51:55] Speaker A: So they know once you feel like you ran off, that's cool. But you know you can never come back to the well again. The well closed for you now. Cause I be thinking like, I be really wanting to do it, but I'm like, is this $25 really worth our whole relationship? And I could use that 25 right now, bro. But you got it. Cause if I couldn't afford to lose it, I gave it to you, knowing I may lose this. It's a gamble when you let somebody borrow something. [00:52:28] Speaker B: If one person that I know in my life that if I borrow money from, they gonna hit me up before the money hit my bank account. And that's my mama. Boy, my mama gonna be like, she gonna be on it. I promise she gonna be on it. Yeah. And she be like, hey, hey, when you gonna. Hey, you got that for me? [00:52:51] Speaker A: And see me like now, I'm not gonna lie, bro, that would make me mad because I'm a stand up guy when it comes to. I feel like this, even if I'm about broke. And I ain't just saying no camera stuff like just. Cause we doing this. This is real life, me. Even if you let me borrow $50, bro, and I got $100 left and I got something going on, bro, I'm gonna pay your money. And if I don't pay your money, bro, we gonna talk about, hey, can I do, can I do. We gonna make some type of rating. I'm never gonna leave you in the dark. So for somebody to be like, if I tell you I'm paying you Friday, don't hit me a day before Friday, you don't even have to hit me by the end of the day Friday. Because more than likely I'm not gonna forget that you helped me out so you don't have to hit me up. And when you hit me, like, hit me up, dime, I'm not gonna lie. That's gonna be really, really ticked me off, bro. I ain't gonna lie. That's gonna tick me off. [00:53:40] Speaker B: And that Ma Dukes, man. Shout out. Ma Dukes, man. She the one person that, like, really, you know, helped me to, like, let people know up ahead of time about certain things. Bill collectors and stuff like that. Like, let them know that, you know what I'm saying, you gonna pay them. You know what I'm saying? [00:53:57] Speaker A: Yeah, me personally, man, I feel like, man, just. [00:53:59] Speaker B: But you see people walking around with. You know what I'm saying? They say they gonna pay you. And they. And you get on Facebook on social media and be looking at them, bro, like, stunting, man. [00:54:10] Speaker A: That jump make me mad. Like. [00:54:12] Speaker B: And it. [00:54:12] Speaker A: Your family member, it made me mad, bro. I'm not even about to sit up here and lie. Like, it don't make me mad. Like, it makes me mad. [00:54:18] Speaker B: But you tell your old lady that y' all talk about. [00:54:22] Speaker A: Yeah, man, one thing about it, bro, she gonna know. I might soften the blow for a lot of people, but she gonna know the real about everything. Like, I'm gonna tell her, like, I. [00:54:31] Speaker B: Better get ugly, too. And I'm talking. [00:54:38] Speaker A: Because it'd be something like, what? Excuse my language, y'. [00:54:41] Speaker B: All. [00:54:42] Speaker A: What a. Doing all that flexing up here now. He'll feel bad if I went up there and said, nigga, you doing all that and you owe me. Boom, boom, boom, I said. But I don't even operate like that, bro. But, like, I just be having to say it. Cause it just made me feel better saying it. I'm never gonna say it publicly or, like, try to expose anybody, but it just made me feel good to get it off my chest, bro. Just like. I don't know, bro. It just. Because my attitude, for one, if it used to be way worse, but if I'm not careful, bro, that that same thing could creep back up, like. So I try to make sure I keep that in check, bro. I try to keep my attitude in check, bro, because I understand those moments when you have those outbursts, bro. It can go to a place that you don't want it to go. Cause if I get on your status and embarrass you now you feel like I'm trying to play with you now. Something that could have been talked about behind the scenes might be about to get ugly. Cause when you buck back, I'mma bulk back and we Just gonna be two bucking people until somebody. And I'm one of them type people, like, I'm not a gangster, none of that. But like, if you gonna take it on that level, bro, let's go to bunk head. Like, let's really do something. And I'm gonna want to go to a level that you might not want to go to, so. Or you might want to go to a level that I ain't really ready. [00:55:51] Speaker B: To go to, but stuff you can't come back from, like what it is. [00:55:55] Speaker A: And things that people do and some people mind. And some people mind. [00:55:59] Speaker B: Me and my mom would talk about it, she was like, nah, I can't say that God can restore all he can. Yeah, he really can, man. Some stuff. And it's true though, you know what I'm saying? I had a family member say something to me some years ago, man, that thing had rocked me and it hurted me, man. I carried that for a little minute and I was like, man, f that. But you know what I'm saying, after God kind of was dealing with my heart with some stuff, man, I start to see the insecurity of the individual who said it. Some of the things that they dealing with on a personal level, even though, like God gave me insight of their personal life, man, and you know what I'm saying, some of the challenges that they dealing with and I don't know, for some odd reason I felt level of remorse and he could do it right. [00:56:48] Speaker A: But you know, the one thing that people don't kind of like factor in the whole God situation, because they always hear us talk about God. And I'm sure it's people that listen and be like many more talking about God. He had to have a willing vessel. If you're not willing, he says, I stand at the door and knock. He ain't gonna bust the door down. He's going to stand at the door and knock. So at the end of the day, those who want knowledge, he'll give it to you liberally. Those who want that stuff, he'll give it to you liberally. In order for you to want to not be that, you have to be willing. He can do it, but it's not saying you gonna pray about it today and then tomorrow you're gonna be able to sit in the room with that person, or what that person said just ain't gonna fade you no more. It's gonna be a process. But you got to be willing. You gotta be willing to let him come in. You gotta be willing to let him make those changes. And also, you have to be willing to get the extra help if needed. It's a lot of people that ain't willing. They pray about it, but they ain't really willing. Because some people like walking around with something to be mad about. Some people love to be offended, bro. And I just can't get that through people's head enough. You have some people that love it, so you have to be willing to be open to, you know, I might talk to this person again. The difference in something that I saw, that was that I just feared. I was like, bro, that could never be me, man. I saw this couple man in court addressing the person that killed her son, and they were like, I wanna give you a hug and I forgive you, bruh. Bruh, I'm gonna be honest. [00:58:24] Speaker B: That's chilling, though. [00:58:25] Speaker A: I'm not there yet. I'm not gonna lie to you all this good. I ain't there yet. But that lets you know that we serve a God that can. It's just. Are you willing because to sit up here and say, you took my son, life, you took my loved one. You took my baby. But I want to give you a hug because I forgive you, I love you and God love you, bro. Man, it would have took the National Guard to get me off that person. They would have let me get close to him, bruh, but that's just how I think, so. [00:58:55] Speaker B: That's tough, man. [00:58:56] Speaker A: Is there anything that you can't come back from? No. But are you willing to? Are you willing? That's the bigger question. Are you willing? [00:59:04] Speaker B: That's a lot of work, though. I ain't even gonna fake you said, where we at with the time? [00:59:10] Speaker A: I had put up two minutes. [00:59:11] Speaker B: Oh, you got two minutes. Oh, man, I ain't seen you with all the lights. [00:59:15] Speaker A: Okay, so let me say this, too. This is the last thing I want to say. When we were speaking about the homeless people and all of that stuff, we did something with a group of young men. One day, we were speaking to a group of young men. We were talking about. We had my uncle in there doing the MAT program about the drug abuse and all that stuff. We got the pills. And the young man was like, oh, I never do that. I never do that. But he was an athlete. And I told him. I was like, hey, bro, I said, I want y' all to quit looking at these people like they chose to have this life, like they chose to do that. I said, a lot of people are in these circumstances that they're in because as an Athlete, you get hurt, you take the medicine, you start being able to relax. You realize you ain't in pain that much. The stuff that people saying ain't bothering you, so you kind of just start taking them to cope with life. To cope with life, I said. And then that spirals into being out of control. Basically, what I'm saying is this. Be mindful of the people that we deal with and the people that have circumstances. Don't think that everybody is in those circumstances because they just chose to do so. That's just what they wanted to do. Because if you go and ask most of those people, nobody wanted to be in the predicament that they're in. So when you're dealing with different people, man, offer grace, man, because we're only one disaster or one mistake away from being somewhere where we ain't want to be. Absolutely. So be graceful when you're dealing with people, man, and understand, be empathetic, because it can't be us. We're not doing stuff that's so great. That's so whatever that we deserve. But God's grace and mercy gives us the ability to live like we're living. So just be thankful and mindful of that when you're dealing with different people, man, whatever circumstance that they may be in. Because it's our job to be servants anyway. We're no bigger than the next man. So keep that in your mind when you're dealing with people. And that's all I got for you. What you got for them, B? [01:01:09] Speaker B: Listen, y', all, man, listen, if y' all made it to the end of the show, man, thank you so much, man. Can you do us a favor, please? Can you go to our social media page, which our engineer probably gonna put in? You know what I'm saying? You know our social media. What the word I'm looking for. [01:01:27] Speaker A: Accounts. Yeah, TikToks, yeah, Instagram, all that stuff. [01:01:29] Speaker B: And so, yeah, so make sure y' all just. You know what I'm saying? Just reach out, man. And I and Instagram Kim Podcast, we have a link under there that will show y', all, like, if y' all have any questions or anything y' all want to put in, make sure y' all just engage, man. [01:01:44] Speaker A: And if you got a story you want to tell your story, man, reach out to one of us, man. We'll be sure to hit you back. [01:01:49] Speaker B: Yes, sir. [01:01:50] Speaker A: And we out. Yes, sir.