Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Foreign.
[00:00:14] Speaker B: I'm your host, B.
And you tuning in to the Kimi Podcast, where we laugh, we keep it real, and we challenge each other to grow.
We talk faith, family, and relationship and what it takes to become a better man. Listen, you don't have to have it all together to become part of the kingdom. Subscribe, share this with someone and add your voice to the conversation. Remember, heads high, crowns higher, fellas. What it do, man? How everybody doing right now? I want you. Listen, I got two guests more like brothers along with me, on the side of me, man. And I want y' all boys to introduce yourselves and add y' all social media, you know what I'm saying? Where people can reach out to you.
Go ahead, brother. Yeah, go ahead, man. Tell the people a little bit about you, man, and where they can reach you at all.
[00:01:10] Speaker C: I'm Roosevelt. Roosevelt Durant.
It's not a lot to it, man. I'm an educator by day. I'm a fitness coach, do a little bit of everything, man. I'm a future farmer, future counselor. So I'm just kind of one of those guys, man. I wear the hat that's necessary at the given time, man. Wherever I'm needed, that's where I am.
Social media can be reached at R. Durant, ig, and that's pretty much it. That's where I could be reaching. If you're trying to get fit, you're trying to have somebody to hold you accountable, whatever the case may be, I'm here for it. So yes, sir, that's it for me, bro.
[00:01:44] Speaker D: You already know who it is. It's Mr. Hill. To feel.
[00:01:46] Speaker B: Yes, sir, man.
[00:01:47] Speaker D: Back again. It's been a long time, B. I don't know if I did something to you or not, but you know what I'm saying? I'm glad to be back sitting beside you, brother.
[00:01:55] Speaker B: Man, I'm glad you back.
I love that you back. I love your energy to leave that, man.
[00:02:01] Speaker D: You know, man, if I got it, you got it. But sometimes you just don't have to ask for it right then.
But, man, Hilton Field. H E A L the number two F E E L L L C on IG and on Facebook, man. Man, we here about to have some, man, strong conversations, man. We was having strong conversations before we started, man, so I'm excited, man, to get into it, man.
[00:02:22] Speaker B: Yes, sir. Yeah. But before we really actually get started into the subject, man, y' all up for a little game?
[00:02:30] Speaker D: Yes, sir.
[00:02:30] Speaker B: There's a little game that I that I put together, man, and it called Stand on it.
I'm using real life situations, and I'm gonna read it out to y'. All. And y' all gotta let me know if you gonna stand on that or you disagree.
[00:02:45] Speaker D: Okay?
[00:02:46] Speaker B: And it's real life situations now. Word.
[00:02:49] Speaker D: I like how y' all putting the games in this, man. Last few times I've been on, man, y' all putting games.
I see y', all, man. I see y' all for sure.
[00:02:55] Speaker B: Hey, so I'm gonna start off with the first one, man.
And, Bill, you can answer first and then go to tj. Okay. I'm just here to feel.
So the trash is full. This is a scenario. The trash is full and both of you are home. And I say both of you. You and your old lady should. The man should take out without. Take the trash out without being asked. Do you stand on that or disagree?
[00:03:21] Speaker C: I stand on that.
[00:03:22] Speaker B: Stand on that. Yeah. Okay.
[00:03:23] Speaker D: I stand on that. I stand on that.
[00:03:24] Speaker B: Stand on that, too.
[00:03:25] Speaker D: That just come from raising?
[00:03:26] Speaker B: Yeah, just raising. Yeah. So.
[00:03:28] Speaker D: But my daddy ain't play that ball.
[00:03:31] Speaker B: So every time the man take the
[00:03:32] Speaker D: trash out, I mean, if it's there and you see it need to be taken out. Yeah. I mean, pile up.
[00:03:38] Speaker B: That what I'm saying. Cause sometimes I'm using my life, my scenario.
[00:03:43] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:03:44] Speaker B: My wife and my daughter leave the trash right there, like, on the trash, man, and it just be piled up for me to take the trash out.
I had a long day. I could be in the trash. Yes, sir. Overflowing. Yeah, Overflowing. Yeah.
[00:04:00] Speaker C: I'm gonna take it out, But I'm gonna have some words while taking it out.
[00:04:02] Speaker B: I'll take it out.
[00:04:03] Speaker C: Y' all know good and well somebody saw this trash. But matter of fact, you put the last piece of trash on top of the trash, and now you're waiting on
[00:04:10] Speaker B: me as soon as you touch it, I'm say, this. My pet peeve is that trash all the way up over full to the point where you can't pack it down. Now I gotta put my hands on that? Oh, man.
[00:04:23] Speaker D: Yes, sir.
[00:04:24] Speaker C: Or get a whole nother trash bag to dump it in because it's over.
[00:04:27] Speaker B: I got an attitude immediately. Oh, yeah, I got an attitude, all right. Second, your woman. Your woman correct you in front of your friends. You should address it right there instead of waiting till you get home. You standing on there or you disagree?
How you addressing that?
[00:04:45] Speaker C: You coming to me first time.
[00:04:47] Speaker D: I disagree with that, man.
You can't have no dissension in the ranks, man. You can't show Right, right.
[00:04:54] Speaker B: That.
[00:04:54] Speaker D: That. That portion of your relationship.
[00:04:56] Speaker B: Yeah, that's right.
[00:04:57] Speaker D: Cause, man, you just never know somebody's other intention, man. Man, you might think it's your friend, but, man. Man, you know, he don't need to be talking to you like that. You know what I'm saying? Man, I never talk to you like that. Not saying that. That's an always thing. But, man, you just have to remain aware of the situation that you in. So, no, I don't agree with that. Cause, like, either right or wrong, I'm gonna stand by you. But, man, when we together, we by ourselves. Hey, man, you know, you was tripping.
[00:05:21] Speaker B: You was wrong.
[00:05:21] Speaker D: You know, you was tripping, though.
[00:05:22] Speaker B: You hurt my ego.
[00:05:27] Speaker C: One of my favorite sayings, man, is there. There's a time and place for everything. You understand what I'm saying? So if there's something that need to be addressed, you just need to just pump your brakes and let's discuss it when we get behind our. Our doors, you know what I mean, to deal with it then.
[00:05:39] Speaker B: So, yeah. So you. You basically cool with her.
Y' all saying y' all cool?
[00:05:45] Speaker D: No, sir, I'm not cool. I ain't saying I'm cool.
[00:05:47] Speaker B: But you ain't gonna address it in front of. Okay, yeah. All right. I got.
[00:05:50] Speaker C: Y' all definitely gonna circle back to it.
[00:05:51] Speaker D: We're gonna have to talk about that.
[00:05:52] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:05:55] Speaker A: Hey.
[00:05:56] Speaker D: Cause imagine homegirls. I mean, to me, like, that's something she may address in front of her friends. And I ain't saying that's right or wrong, but imagine that, man. Because a man is going to be more demonstrative, especially when his ego is, you know, put in a compromising situation.
Whether you have dealt with your ego or not, it's going. It's going to hit you. Like, dang, bro. Like, you. You cool. Right, right, right.
You don't take all that. No, like what you said. Rosa is a time and a place.
[00:06:27] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:06:28] Speaker B: Hey, I'm gonna tell you, she. She getting that Ike look now.
[00:06:31] Speaker C: Oh, yeah.
[00:06:32] Speaker B: Like that Ike look.
And you didn't. You didn. You did. You didn't dress me like that. Oh, you got Ike look now. Like, hold up now. They look like you give your kids. You lost your mind.
Oh, that was how my mama used.
How mama used to do when we used to act up.
Oh, yeah. I don't know how women do this right now.
You can read they lips like, I'm a teenager, do the grind of te. Oh, yeah.
[00:06:58] Speaker C: Sometimes that's worse than natural words, man. They used to have my heart racing so bad, bro. In church, we used to be acting up.
[00:07:03] Speaker B: Oh, man.
[00:07:04] Speaker C: Oh, man.
[00:07:05] Speaker D: And don't think she forgot.
[00:07:06] Speaker C: Cause she.
[00:07:06] Speaker B: No, no, no, no. Woman never.
[00:07:08] Speaker D: As soon as you get in the
[00:07:09] Speaker C: car, bring your head here.
[00:07:10] Speaker B: Oh, man, the third one, man, let's go. Your boy asked you to borrow money, but he still owe you from last time. You should tell.
[00:07:19] Speaker C: No, that goes without saying.
[00:07:21] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:07:22] Speaker C: Nah.
[00:07:23] Speaker D: And you ain't gotta go no further with that.
[00:07:25] Speaker C: Nah, nah.
[00:07:27] Speaker B: You said, hell, no. That's not the same. You ain't get no money, man.
[00:07:30] Speaker D: No, sir.
[00:07:31] Speaker B: You ain't pay me back.
[00:07:32] Speaker C: You know what I say?
[00:07:32] Speaker D: You know what I say? I say, man, you outstanding. You got an outstanding balance.
[00:07:37] Speaker A: Like, it's like you can't even get a bank loan like that.
[00:07:39] Speaker C: Right, right.
[00:07:41] Speaker A: Your. Your credit is messed up.
[00:07:42] Speaker D: Look, you ain't even paid towards it.
[00:07:44] Speaker A: Yeah, you ain't even. You ain't even said, hey, man, I'm gonna give you this 20.
I'm the worst one is you asking me for more money. But you was at the club last night.
[00:07:54] Speaker C: That's a fact.
[00:07:54] Speaker A: Or you was at the bar or not. You taking selfies with you and your girl at dinner, right?
[00:07:58] Speaker D: And then you looking at it on
[00:07:59] Speaker A: social media, be like, yo, see, I'm the type petty person don't go live.
I'm showing up to the table.
[00:08:06] Speaker B: Yeah, you showing up to the table.
[00:08:07] Speaker C: What we eating on you, brother? What we eating on tonight?
[00:08:12] Speaker D: What we.
[00:08:14] Speaker B: That's funny, man. I'm gonna tell you. I was just talking to my uncle before I came in here, man, about something about my mama, which is his sister. And I said, that's one person that you don't wanna borrow money from.
Like, you don't wanna borrow money from my mama. But she getting her money back any mean necessary. I don't know how she. I remember she let me borrow $500, right? And she said, you gonna pay me back? I said, yes, man, I'll pay you back. And this is when I was in the military. And she said.
And I forgot that she had access to my bank account. So some money had hit my account.
And she must be. Had me checking my account every day, man. She must be. Because before I even can get hold of my car, first, that $500 was gone.
I'm like. I'm like, damn, you even give me the chance?
[00:09:10] Speaker D: No, no, no. She didn't even skip it off. She didn't even try to skip it on Bo. She ain't even trying to skim it off one time. Yay.
[00:09:17] Speaker B: Hey.
My uncle asked me. She was like. He was like, well, you was gonna pay her first. And I said I was. But I ain't gonna lie. I probably would have half it up. I ain't gonna lie with it half it up.
I go too much.
[00:09:32] Speaker C: At least you got it out the way.
[00:09:35] Speaker B: That's funny to me, man. That's funny, though. Okay, okay.
[00:09:38] Speaker C: Mama could have warned you, though.
[00:09:40] Speaker B: All right, so your friend is making some bad decisions, and everyone is hyping him up. A real friend telling the truth, even at cost of friendship. You stand on that or you disagree?
[00:09:50] Speaker D: Oh, man, I'm for sure standing on that because, like, you ain't about to be around me making poor decisions and think I'm gonna applaud you for it. Like, straight up, man.
[00:09:59] Speaker B: You keeping it 100 with him.
[00:10:00] Speaker D: I mean, you always have to keep it 100, because if you always living for the cheers, you would die by the booze, man.
[00:10:10] Speaker B: You agree, too?
[00:10:11] Speaker D: Absolutely.
[00:10:12] Speaker B: Now, these questions about to get a little tough now.
[00:10:14] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:10:14] Speaker B: It about to get a little tough, so, you know, we got a few more questions. Ready? Hey, your mama asks you for money, but giving it to her will put your own household behind.
You should say no. Stand on it or disagree?
[00:10:31] Speaker D: I'm standing on that.
I'm standing on that.
[00:10:35] Speaker B: You said nah. Yeah, yeah, okay.
[00:10:38] Speaker D: Like my granddaddy said, hey, if you can't afford to lose it, man, don't give it away.
[00:10:41] Speaker B: That's facts. I like that.
[00:10:43] Speaker D: I like that. Cause then, like, okay, you can't. Now you trying to get it back from her, man. You. It's hard.
[00:10:51] Speaker B: You short now.
[00:10:53] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:10:53] Speaker B: And then, like, your lady looking at you, you scrambling. Yeah.
[00:10:57] Speaker D: So, like, what. What are we really saying right now?
What are we saying right now?
[00:11:01] Speaker B: But it's a real life situation, man.
[00:11:04] Speaker D: I'm saying that. Cause I had to deal. I had to deal with that. I had to deal with that. My mom hit me up and asked me for some money, you know?
And, I mean, my son had maybe Taekwondo, had to pay 200, man, for his tuition and for his testing and all that. She asked me for 200.
[00:11:19] Speaker B: I said, I ain't got it.
[00:11:22] Speaker D: Hey, you might as well say, I'm Social Security. I'm on a fixed income.
[00:11:26] Speaker B: Yeah, we literally
[00:11:30] Speaker D: right?
[00:11:31] Speaker B: So that's just belt, man. You ain't gonna escape this one. What's up? Where your thoughts at?
[00:11:36] Speaker C: Yeah, that's a tough one, man. But one thing I'll say is that I, you know, knowing my mom, like, she'll be understanding of the situation. Like, I made sure I explained to her, like, listen, everything in my heart wants, you know, wants to be able to give you that money, but I won't be able to do it this time. But at the same time, I'm gonna help her figure it out, though. That's just the way I rock with my mom, bro.
I'm not gonna leave her hanging, you know what I'm saying? So I'm gonna do everything in my will to help her figure it out. It may not come from my own personal account, but we're gonna figure it out together, though.
[00:12:05] Speaker B: Yeah. I ain't gonna lie. I agree with both of y' all guys on this situation, man. A family member disrespect your wife or partner at a gathering, you should address it in front of everybody, right? Then you stand on there, you disagree,
[00:12:20] Speaker C: somebody gonna get slapped up.
What you said, boy, I'm telling you right now, we ain't doing that.
We're not doing that.
[00:12:28] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:12:29] Speaker C: Like, for real.
[00:12:30] Speaker B: But you know what, though, Vel, this is really a sensitive question, is because sometimes, depending on your old lady, you might have a sensitive old lady, and your family, like, might be, like, jokey, jokey all the time. You know what I'm saying? And maybe the old lady took it out wrong.
[00:12:50] Speaker C: It depends on how they're addressing her.
Are they addressing her? Are they like, is this like a confronting type thing or, you know what I mean? Like, it depends on how. It's one of, like, addressing her. Be like, hey, you need to kind of do this right here a little differently or take care of X, Y and Z, you know what I'm saying? But if you coming at her in a way that's like. And depending on, again, who. Who it is, because, yeah, if you disrespect the wife, you disrespecting me, because she's an extension to me. You understand what I'm saying?
[00:13:19] Speaker B: That's fair.
[00:13:19] Speaker D: And I gotta go home.
[00:13:21] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
[00:13:22] Speaker D: And then, too, I think it's important to understand the relationship that she has with the person who's saying it, too. Yeah, boy.
[00:13:29] Speaker B: Listen, man, time and place, that's important, too. Yeah.
[00:13:31] Speaker D: You know what I mean? So even though.
Because one thing about us, man, we don't like being embarrassed in front of a couple crowd. We don't think about this as, you know, black people. We don't like being the butt of the joke for sure. Like, especially in front of people.
So even if, you know, the person don't mean Any harm, man, you know how we go and we get to going, everybody laughing and keeping it going.
Man, that thing getting you?
[00:13:57] Speaker C: I'll tell you what, man, he's up over.
[00:14:00] Speaker B: My old lady ain't really a jokey, jokey type. I mean, she jokey, jokey. I mean, she can joke, but like not like cracking jokes on her. And you know what I'm saying, she
[00:14:09] Speaker D: ain't about to be the butt.
[00:14:10] Speaker B: Nah, she definitely not, man.
[00:14:13] Speaker C: It's about how you address it, man. I mean, like I said, if it comes from a place of love, like, you know what I mean? If it's like a elder in the family or something like that coming to her, hey, but you know what I mean, like on that type of thing, a place of love. But if it's somebody like addressing her and doing it openly and embarrassing her in kind of like a put down type situation, I'm gonna be in my feelings, you know what I mean?
[00:14:34] Speaker A: I agree, but I think that's.
See, that's a difficult question to answer because my family know me and if it's my old lady, you know I don't play like that.
[00:14:49] Speaker D: Right.
[00:14:50] Speaker A: So they would know not to because they know my reaction going to be facts.
[00:14:55] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:14:56] Speaker A: And then I think if your old lady been around enough and like I would think a friend would be more likely to do something rather than a family.
[00:15:04] Speaker B: Yeah, a friend probably would.
[00:15:06] Speaker A: A friend would probably do something. Like I had a friend try one of my homeboy's girls. That didn't end well for him. But I think that's more or less. I think the family question is a little difficult.
[00:15:16] Speaker B: Yeah, it is.
[00:15:17] Speaker A: Because if it's your old lady, I don't bring nobody around unless I know they gonna be around.
So there's people don't meet my family at all. Cause that's a long trip to New York. So if I take you home, you know that means you mean something.
[00:15:28] Speaker D: Yeah, you should say welcome to death row.
[00:15:29] Speaker A: Yeah. Once you signed up, you signed up.
[00:15:34] Speaker B: Signed up, you signed up.
[00:15:35] Speaker A: Like it ain't. Like it ain't where you wait. Like if my family was closer, maybe that'll be different. But to put somebody in a car or fly them out to my house and introduce my mom, I asked a little much, so my and my family know me. So I think it's a little bit difficult.
[00:15:47] Speaker B: It is, but.
[00:15:49] Speaker A: But around your friends. But then you do got. Sometimes you got that drunk cousin or that uncle that might say a little
[00:15:54] Speaker C: something, that's the one who going to get Have a problem. That's going to be the problem. And I think.
[00:15:58] Speaker A: And I think you just. You just. I'm confrontational,
[00:16:03] Speaker C: so I'mma sober you up.
[00:16:04] Speaker D: Hey, hey.
[00:16:05] Speaker B: You know what?
[00:16:05] Speaker D: You said, I'm sober you up.
[00:16:07] Speaker B: This situation happened a lot more than we probably think.
[00:16:12] Speaker A: But then. But then that's.
[00:16:14] Speaker B: It might be immediate, but.
[00:16:15] Speaker A: No, I'm sure it does. But then I question that man.
[00:16:18] Speaker B: Right?
[00:16:20] Speaker A: Not the person who did it. I question that man.
[00:16:22] Speaker B: Question that, man.
[00:16:23] Speaker A: Like I said, I know all you guys.
I've known you guys sort of a short period of time, and I don't foresee anybody in your family trying your lady or saying something disrespectful to her because of the respect for you. For sure.
[00:16:40] Speaker B: I ain't gonna lie. I didn't have a situation.
I had a situation and I did. And I almost exiled myself from the family.
You know what I'm saying? Cause. Cause, man, listen, man, it was that extreme. It was.
[00:16:58] Speaker A: It was.
[00:16:58] Speaker B: It was that extreme.
[00:16:59] Speaker C: I got you.
[00:17:00] Speaker B: It was that extreme.
[00:17:01] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:17:02] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:17:03] Speaker D: I'll just ask, like.
[00:17:04] Speaker B: It was. It was at the. It was that extreme.
[00:17:08] Speaker A: You're a better man than me. Because I resort to physical violence when I feel, like, my people being attacked. Like, I just.
[00:17:14] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:17:14] Speaker C: Let's just say I feel you, though.
[00:17:16] Speaker A: Even if you whip my ass. Like, even if you with my ass, I'm gonna jump on you, especially.
[00:17:20] Speaker D: And if you know what kind of attitude I got, man. So, like.
[00:17:22] Speaker A: And like I said, my people know me. Like.
[00:17:24] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:17:24] Speaker A: That's why I don't go out. I don't deal with a lot of stuff. Cause I got. I got a short one for sure. And if you do. If you do anything to me or my people, I'm. You just gonna have to beat my ass.
[00:17:32] Speaker C: Cause.
And I'm. And I'm. And I'm the type that I react faster for my loved ones than I would for me. Like, I can. Like you was talking about the joking. Like. All right, joke on me a little bit. It is what it is. You gotta. You gotta limit. But when you start coming from my family, my immediate family, black op. Yeah.
[00:17:49] Speaker D: Responsible for.
[00:17:51] Speaker A: Yeah, lady. Because especially guys from our age group or our demographic provide and protect. Know what I'm saying? I'm Protect my lady no matter what.
[00:18:00] Speaker C: There it is.
[00:18:00] Speaker A: Even if in a moment she wrong. But that's a conversation for me and her to hop.
[00:18:03] Speaker C: There you go.
[00:18:04] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:18:05] Speaker A: The conversation for me. Out outside. Everybody need to know I'mma don't mess with her because you got to deal with him.
[00:18:11] Speaker C: Exactly.
[00:18:11] Speaker A: Now, when we get to the house. Hey, now. Yeah. Don't put me in that situation again.
[00:18:15] Speaker B: Right, Right.
[00:18:17] Speaker A: Don't put me in a situation. Now, Me and her gotta have that. But it ain't gonna be out in public at the event.
[00:18:22] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:18:23] Speaker A: I might jack my man up. Hey, man. Hey. You gotta see me. What the kids say now. We gotta run that 30.
[00:18:27] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:18:28] Speaker C: Whatever it is.
[00:18:31] Speaker A: 30 seconds of a fight.
[00:18:38] Speaker C: That's all I gotta do. Break it up.
[00:18:41] Speaker B: Whoever won one.
[00:18:43] Speaker A: So that's about to be what it is.
[00:18:44] Speaker B: But.
[00:18:45] Speaker A: And my lady needs to see that I can protect like that. But then I think some women kind of toxic. And you can't do that all the time. Because then they be putting you in situations.
[00:18:50] Speaker D: I'm about to say, they'll put you in them situations.
[00:18:52] Speaker A: Then they be going, she be out after that.
[00:18:54] Speaker B: Just appease their little ego, you know, Women got bigger. I always say women got more egos than man.
That's a fact.
All right.
Your child has a game on the same day. Your job offer. Overtime you need.
You should turn down overtime and go to the game. Stand on that or you disagree?
[00:19:14] Speaker D: I'm going to the game.
[00:19:15] Speaker B: Going to the game.
[00:19:15] Speaker D: Matter of fact, man, I had a second job. I just quit. Cause I wasn't taking no time for my son.
[00:19:19] Speaker B: That's love, boy.
[00:19:20] Speaker D: For real.
[00:19:20] Speaker B: I ain't lying.
[00:19:21] Speaker D: I'm gonna play by that.
[00:19:22] Speaker B: And the reason why, I guess it all depends on what you value the most. Cause some people value money.
[00:19:29] Speaker D: Yeah. Yeah, they do. And I'll say this man, like, his age is more important for me to be there than to go to work.
[00:19:37] Speaker B: Come on.
[00:19:37] Speaker D: Like, now, if it was like 15, 16. Oh, I gotta get that money on real quick. I'll be back.
[00:19:44] Speaker B: Yeah, I gotta get that money.
[00:19:45] Speaker D: But like, he nine.
[00:19:46] Speaker B: Yeah. And they grow fast, too.
[00:19:48] Speaker D: It means something for him to see
[00:19:50] Speaker B: they go extremely fast. What you got?
[00:19:52] Speaker C: It's funny, man.
I see you got him with you. And I was just looking just a minute. I was like, dang, I should have bought my son. I was just thinking about that. He nine.
[00:19:59] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:20:00] Speaker C: You know what I mean? And I just thinking myself. But I was, you know, I wasn't sure, like, exactly what the setup would look. You know what I mean?
[00:20:04] Speaker B: I wouldn't want him to be.
[00:20:05] Speaker C: But if I would have. Just thinking like two at the same time. I was. I was admiring that, bro. So salute to you. I was thinking to myself, like, it'd be cool for my son to see us sitting around having this conversation back to what we're saying about the barbershop. He need to see. He need to have a conversation. That's what my dad did. Took me on the little ride alongs, you know what I mean? To see these things.
[00:20:22] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:20:23] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:20:23] Speaker A: Which I say, cool. But I disagree.
[00:20:24] Speaker B: Indeed, you disagree. You going, you don't get that money.
[00:20:27] Speaker D: Surprise.
[00:20:28] Speaker B: You gonna get that money.
[00:20:29] Speaker C: I do disagree.
[00:20:31] Speaker B: I a surprise you. I go get her money.
[00:20:33] Speaker D: Man.
[00:20:34] Speaker A: It ain't about the. To me, it ain't about the value of the money, but the point. I always listen to the question. And the question said, the money that you need.
[00:20:42] Speaker C: He said need. Exactly.
[00:20:44] Speaker A: It wasn't like, I need it for the champagne.
[00:20:46] Speaker C: That's right.
[00:20:46] Speaker A: It was money that I needed. And if it's a need my son needs to see, especially my son needs to see making sacrifices to take care of the family. That's the way I look at it.
[00:20:56] Speaker D: I understand.
[00:20:56] Speaker A: So he needs to understand, hey, sometimes daddy can't be there because in my situation, Daddy's all he got.
So mama live in Atlanta, and if we work it out sometimes where she take him to the tournament, if I gotta be here at the studio or if I got whatever. But he needs. I need my son to understand a particular point of grind that is just for that. Now, some people value it, see it differently, but to me, I just think he needs to see the hard work of it. And I don't miss a lot.
But if it just can't work. And I need that money. Need that money, cuz. Need means we either gonna be homeless or we gonna be carless.
[00:21:32] Speaker D: Yep.
[00:21:33] Speaker A: Or the light's gonna be off.
[00:21:34] Speaker D: Oh, I feel, I feel that. But I'mma still say this. He's still going with me. Whatever I gotta do.
[00:21:39] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
[00:21:40] Speaker D: I mean, even if I need that
[00:21:42] Speaker C: money, I like that. I like that.
[00:21:43] Speaker D: Oh, he still come with me to get that money.
[00:21:45] Speaker A: Well, no, I agree with that. Then I agree.
It was like leave the, you know, money to go to the game or not go to the game to get the money. And so from the question.
[00:21:54] Speaker B: Perspective.
[00:21:55] Speaker D: Yeah. And this is just me too. Now I know more than one way to make money.
[00:22:00] Speaker A: True.
[00:22:00] Speaker D: I have more than one source of income to get money. So that's the mindset I'm in. Like, I'm going to get some money after I leave here. You know what I'm saying? So it ain't a thing of, like, man, me going to another job and my job is my job. You know what I'm saying? And like, I Don't believe in giving too much to my job if it means taking away.
[00:22:22] Speaker A: And I think when you're able to create the balance, if you have the ability to create balance, that's the biggest thing you can do is be there for your kids as much as you possibly can. Because you've been able to create, you've been able to put yourself in a position where I don't have to go to everything because I have other streams of income coming in, I feel, you know what I'm saying? And I was just speaking to the point of what if that guy.
[00:22:44] Speaker D: The question.
[00:22:44] Speaker A: Yeah, that guy don't have those options. He doesn't have.
[00:22:48] Speaker D: Now if that's the case, your point of view, like, hey man, I gotta get this. Yeah, I got like, I ain't got no other way to get it.
[00:22:54] Speaker A: But this right here, this right here, this overtime going to save this house.
[00:22:58] Speaker D: Hey, shoot. That not going to get you them shoes. You want, you know, whatever it is, whatever luxury.
[00:23:03] Speaker C: Yeah. I'm just saying, like that's a quote
[00:23:04] Speaker D: unquote need because everybody got different. Like you said, it might be a big.
[00:23:07] Speaker A: Everybody has different levels of need.
[00:23:09] Speaker D: Yeah. You know what I'm saying?
[00:23:10] Speaker A: Somebody's need might. I need to go to the strip club tonight and I need that money now. That's the wrong, that's the wrong thing, you know.
[00:23:16] Speaker D: But to them though.
To them though.
[00:23:19] Speaker C: To the trapper.
[00:23:20] Speaker D: To the trapper. Hey, I got to get this so
[00:23:22] Speaker B: I can go back. Blow it, don't blow it.
[00:23:25] Speaker D: I'm trying to go to cinema tonight.
[00:23:27] Speaker B: Hey, that's funny, man.
OG Told me, man, Older guy told me, man, he had congratulated me, me and my wife just had our kid and he was like, man, don't be like me, B. You know what I'm saying?
Like, spend a whole lot of time grinding and making money, you know what I'm saying? He was telling me that his son that is 26 years old right now, you know, him and his son was talking and they was going back in the day when he was going, you know, Disney World and all this other stuff and he didn't win, you know what I'm saying? Cause he was working, he was getting, you know, he was working all the time. He said, but by him sacrifice, working allowed them to enjoy certain things in life. But now as a 60 year old man, he wish he would have went back and enjoy that, you know what I'm saying?
You know, and it's, it's so, it's so hard because if you had the ability to have hindsight, you know, of course you ain't gonna make all the right decisions. But, man, having hindsight by certain situations, you know, by you sacrificing to be there with your son and everything else, you don't know how really that gonna play out in the future.
Just as well, you sacrifice and say, I'm not going to that game, or I can't be able to make it. You know what I'm saying? You don't know how that gonna play out in the future either, you know, so it really hard. It ain't really no right or wrong, you know what I'm saying? When you think about it, that's how
[00:24:57] Speaker D: I see my dad, man. Like, my dad, man, he was working 12 hour shifts at Newcore, dog. So it was certain things he couldn't come to because he had to work.
But now with my son, man, like, that joker don't miss nothing.
You know, being the donuts for dad. I ain't never seen my dad, like, I ain't mad at him.
[00:25:13] Speaker B: That's the craziest.
[00:25:14] Speaker C: That's the sacrifice he had to make at that time of his life.
[00:25:16] Speaker D: You know what I'm saying?
[00:25:18] Speaker A: That's it right there. It's the sacrifice he had to make then.
[00:25:20] Speaker B: He had to make then.
[00:25:21] Speaker A: Yeah, because I think my brother one time was mad with my dad. Cause my dad was doing more for my nephew than he ever did for us.
And I had to come and I had to sit my brother down. I was like, man, the realization is dad was a damn heroin addict when we was growing up. Yeah, he couldn't do.
Came back from Vietnam messed up. He could not do.
So at the end of the day, now he can. He's pouring into. I had to understand. He's pouring into them, the grandkids.
[00:25:47] Speaker C: That's right.
[00:25:48] Speaker A: What we couldn't. What he couldn't give us.
[00:25:51] Speaker B: And, you know. And we don't know the level of guilt that people care too. Listen, you know what I'm saying?
[00:25:57] Speaker A: My dad wear that guilt so much on. His dad wears it. My mom wears it heavy.
Like, they just be like, you know, I tried my hardest. I tried my hardest. I tried my. And I just couldn't give y'. All. So not like now, if I told. If, for example, I never did it because I've never do that to my mama. But if I told my mom I needed to pay my mortgage or my rent, my mother would send me the money today. Facts now, she gonna do it like a drug deal. She Gonna send it to Western Union,
[00:26:19] Speaker B: but she old school, bro.
[00:26:26] Speaker D: And she gonna go to western U.N. yeah, yeah.
[00:26:30] Speaker A: But at the end. But that's her point out, her guilt of what she couldn't give us as kids. And so my. My kids and my. My nieces and my nephews, they don't want for nothing.
[00:26:40] Speaker D: It's beautiful, though. It's beautiful.
[00:26:41] Speaker A: That means I ain't got to spend it.
[00:26:43] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:26:43] Speaker A: I mean, at the end of the day, my daughter need tuition. I can't pay it.
My mom and my dad, they step right in and do what they got to do. So I just think. And I think it's their guilt of not being able to do it now. They can. So.
[00:26:54] Speaker C: And think about it. Look at it this way, too, man. As parents, first of all, there's no blueprint for this thing. So we don't really.
Every day we're learning something new. We're trying to figure out, like, okay, even with having different kids, you're like, you can't parent this kid the way you parent that kid or whatever the case may be. And there's always different seasons to it, so to speak. Right? And so my parents were working their behinds off, doing the best they could with limited education and a different economy and coming from their background and everything else. And so they did the best they could. The main thing that we had, we had love. In our household, that was the main thing. We had love. So being broke, welfare, whatever the case may be, at the end of the day, we had love. I had an amazing childhood. I didn't even know we were struggling when we were struggling. I just found that out here recently. I was like, oh, that's why we had that big old thing of baloney in the refrigerator. You know what I mean? And that's where that came from. I'm thinking, like, oh, y' all went and got some groceries, you know what I'm saying? And so. But we had love. We kept. They kept the roof over our head, and that was a struggle. I found that out recently. Right. And also, too, there was just, you know, there was times that, guess what? Their parents had to step in to help us survive. Right? So those were the grandparents at the time. And, you know, so the struggle was different. And so now, guess what?
They've already went through that sacrifice phase and did everything they could to take care of us and make sure we are safe, healthy, fed love and everything else. And now my dad, he's deceased, but my mom, she's here. And the grandkids, man, listen, it's like Santa Claus all year long. You understand what I'm saying? But the thing is, it's funny. Cause not too long ago, I was sitting with her and she was like, you know, we didn't have all this stuff when you was coming up. Like, almost like she felt that guilt. And she said she remember times when we're like, passed by a fast food spot or something like that. I'd be like, oh, you know, like, you know, kids, I want to go to McDonald's. I want to. Where? You know what I mean? Like, you don't have food at home. You understand what I'm saying? But mom was like. She was like, I couldn't afford to get you a Happy Meal. Sometimes it was either gonna be that or just that was gonna be the thing between keeping lights on. Or do I stop and get you fast food and we just go home and throw out our meat and make you some food at home.
[00:29:02] Speaker D: Yeah. Make some McDonald's.
[00:29:03] Speaker B: Yeah, man.
[00:29:05] Speaker D: But gave a whole different meaning.
[00:29:06] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:29:07] Speaker C: So it's about a sacrifice. So with me personally, and I love what you said, and I like the fact that you said that you got options as far as, like your income, you know what I mean? Because just like with me, like, I do fitness coaching, right? I do training stuff.
I can't take my son, you know, with me to my day job as an educator. You know what I mean? Cause he's at school and I'm working or whatever. But, you know, my additional stuff, I could take him when I'm training with somebody we working out with. I want him to see that. I want him to see a healthy lifestyle. I want him to see daddy get into it. But if it means. If I was working a job, like new core, and it was a matter of keeping the lights on or being at the game, I gotta be there.
[00:29:41] Speaker D: You know what I mean?
[00:29:42] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:29:43] Speaker C: But in. Time is more precious to me. By all means, time is more precious. So I just gotta. I just gotta figure.
Cause you ain't gonna get that time back. You can make the money. You ain't gonna get that time back.
[00:29:54] Speaker B: It's hard to be adult.
You gotta make a lot of choices that we don't know it gonna work out, right?
[00:30:02] Speaker D: Yo, I went to the game last night, and like everybody, man, I say, bro, I do not recommend this thing. Now you better drive slow. Yeah, you better drive. So I say, Cause once you in the field, you ain't getting out.
[00:30:15] Speaker B: Yeah, you just can't.
[00:30:17] Speaker D: You just can't clock out if you clock out it's consequences.
[00:30:20] Speaker B: Yeah, you gotta play the game of Monopoly, boy, for the rest of your life. Indeed, for the rest of your life.
[00:30:26] Speaker D: To the next thing, we ain't get angry. You about to break me down, right?
[00:30:30] Speaker B: You about to break me down.
[00:30:32] Speaker C: We was rushing to adulthood, you know what I mean?
I was rushing to it.
[00:30:36] Speaker B: Now I'm like, maybe because the people that we look up to made it look cool, you know what I'm saying? Like, dang, I can't wait. Like, they got the chance to do whatever they wanted to do.
[00:30:45] Speaker D: Yeah, hey, but.
[00:30:45] Speaker B: Yeah, hey, and we thinking that was freedom. But that's freedom.
[00:30:49] Speaker C: That's freedom.
[00:30:50] Speaker B: But you know what? Sometimes you can look at Sutton how they say from a dirty lens or a lens of, like, illusion. Cause the illusion is, boy, they look free, but the truth is bad.
[00:31:05] Speaker D: Boy, it's costing. It's costing.
[00:31:07] Speaker B: They ain't free, dog. Like, you, like, right now, even right now, you know what I'm saying? Like, you just not going. You're gonna be a slave to something. You gonna be a slave to pay your rent. You gonna be a slave to, you know what I'm saying? Going to a job or you got a business, if you got a business, you go a slave to your customers. You know what I'm saying? Like, either way how you look at it, you gonna be a slave to suck.
[00:31:28] Speaker D: Hey, one thing I used to say, man. Saying what yes to one thing and saying no to another.
That's what you say, right? Youtuf saying yes to one thing is saying no to another.
[00:31:37] Speaker A: Say yes to something, you say, you're
[00:31:39] Speaker D: saying no to something else.
[00:31:39] Speaker A: Yeah. There's no way you can put, like I said, the time and everything. You can't get it back.
[00:31:45] Speaker C: That's right, you can't.
[00:31:46] Speaker A: So if you say yes, let's say you say yes to this over time, you know, even. Let's say you don't have anything else to do except be in the house and check your kids homework.
[00:31:55] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:31:56] Speaker A: And sometimes that goes a long way because then you turn around and your kids getting bad grades and the teacher emailing you every 10 seconds, and you can't figure out what's what. But you. But you don't, you know, you know, the kid almost raising themselves and doing the homework themselves. So even in a situation like that. So if I'm saying yes to this overtime, I'm saying no to spending time with him.
[00:32:13] Speaker B: Yeah. You know, that's a whole nother subject right there, boy. Because I see it all the time with People with kids, like, we just. It just. We make choices about certain things that we just don't know the end result on. But listen, man, we. You know, we. We. We talk a lot about as a man, what we standing on as men, but sometimes we stand on so firm to.
I got it. That nobody knows what we struggling with. You know what I'm saying?
And so I'm going to read this Bible scripture out this. This Bible scripture, and I. I want to. I want. I want to y' all to tell me what y' all gather from it.
All right?
It's from Proverbs 19:20.
Hear, counsel and receive instructions that thou mayest be wise in thy latter end.
And before I go into the next segment to the topic, what y'.
[00:33:15] Speaker D: All.
[00:33:16] Speaker B: What. What's your thoughts on that?
[00:33:17] Speaker D: Read that again for me.
[00:33:18] Speaker B: Okay, here's.
Hear, counsel and receive instructions that thou mayest be wise in thou latter end.
[00:33:27] Speaker C: So take heed to the instruction, man, so you'll have wisdom as you go on throughout life.
[00:33:32] Speaker B: Right, Right.
[00:33:33] Speaker C: That's what I gather from it.
[00:33:34] Speaker B: What you got it from that?
[00:33:35] Speaker D: Along the same lines, man. Just dealing with, you know. Again, went to the game last night. My brother, he's the band director at Wilson, and, man, like, a big majority of the night, he was like, man, man, why I gotta do this? Why we doing this? Why we doing that?
It's like, man, all I need you to do is execute.
I don't need you to ask questions of like, why and how we gonna do this? How we gonna do that? Like, my brother's been the band Earth for 10 years.
Like, he knows what it takes.
So if you sit down and hear what I'm saying and take it in, you know, you don't. You might not understand it right now, but it's gonna be a time and a situation where you're gonna be in that same position that the person that was telling you what to do, he'd be like, dang, man. That's what. That's what B was saying all along, man. That's what vet was saying all along, man. Like, it's like, I get it now is that moment where you can say, I get it now. And it's like you.
[00:34:34] Speaker B: But that come. That come with a level of experience over time.
[00:34:38] Speaker D: Exactly.
[00:34:39] Speaker B: But right now, I just need for you to listen, take these rise instructions.
[00:34:43] Speaker D: I ain't saying this.
[00:34:45] Speaker B: My granddaddy used to say, yo, I
[00:34:48] Speaker D: ain't talking for my health.
I ain't talking for my health.
[00:34:51] Speaker C: That's right.
[00:34:52] Speaker D: I'm Talking to you. I'm talking to you and instructing you this way. Because this is how it is to be done.
[00:34:58] Speaker B: It's funny that you brought about your granddaddy. Cause I wanna go into that, pivot into that.
Really the main subject, you know what I'm saying? The main topic was growing up. Who was y' all OGs and what. You know what I'm saying?
What your OG about them, you value about them.
Y' all boys had some OGs.
[00:35:23] Speaker C: Absolutely.
[00:35:23] Speaker B: Growing up. Absolutely.
[00:35:24] Speaker C: Absolutely. Absolutely.
[00:35:26] Speaker D: And I'm glad, man. Most of my OGs was like, my uncles and my granddad. Like, I always had, like, strong men around me. But outside of that, man, I always think about my high school band director, Mr. Henderson.
He was somebody who was instrumental and me understanding who I was outside of music.
Outside of music. And he took up that time with me and gave me the space, the safe space to mature and gave me certain responsibilities.
And, man, it was even times we would take rides. It was 2007 when Wilson won the state championship in basketball. Man, we went to every playoff game if they was on the road.
Every week we was on the road. And, like, he was just imparting so much stuff that wasn't even related to music.
It's just about, like, being a better man and having an understanding of the things that you have to do to be a man. And the. The type of example that you have to be like. Ain't saying that he was perfect or anything in no way. But the things that is certain standards that you have to have as a man.
Like, to me, that you should carry with you. And, you know, in part to the younger guys that's coming up behind you. So those are the main.
[00:36:43] Speaker B: You said your uncle. No, your band director.
[00:36:46] Speaker D: Yeah, my uncle. And my granddad. My granddad. 87 years old at the original OG, you know what I'm saying? And like Vil was talking about, man, he ain't had no more than a fourth grade education.
[00:36:58] Speaker B: But the wisest man is what.
Yeah.
[00:37:02] Speaker C: You know what I'm saying?
[00:37:02] Speaker D: To this day, he'll say something like, yo, Granddaddy. He just say, mad, T.J. you so smart. I say, mad, Granddaddy. I can't accept you saying that to me.
Because you got experience in things that I never have. I would never have to draw water from a well. Come on.
Yep.
No, I would never have to do that.
I said, granddaddy, you can go right now. I don't care. Whenever the last time you did it, you still know how to do it don't you say, y' all say, and I can teach you how to do it too.
[00:37:32] Speaker B: They be willing. They be willing.
[00:37:33] Speaker C: Yes, sir.
[00:37:34] Speaker B: What about you, Vel? Who was your OG growing up, man, that you just, you know, whatever they say, man, like you took it and you flew over with it. Like
[00:37:45] Speaker C: definitely along the same lines of what you were saying. Man, I was pulling from different people, you know what I mean? I had my grandfather, My grandfather was a pastor. He taught me about the godly relationships, you know what I mean? And that whole thing and just faith.
But he was. I also saw him as a. As a solid man, a man who. He worked, he took care of family, he was a pillar in the community, you know what I mean? My father was the same. My father taught me grind, you know what I mean?
He was a hustler, you know what I mean? Like I said, he only had a sixth grade education, so he did the best he could. So he had. There was nobody coming to save him, you know what I mean? He figured it out on his own. My daddy done ran like three, four businesses and stuff. He had me out there when I was his size, you know, on the side of the road working the produce stand. I was 13 years old.
The cashier at the convenience store, running that on my own, taking groceries, taking stuff out to, you know, the elderly people's car, carrying watermelons. Like we had a. It was a convenience store and we had a produce stand outside, you know what I mean? So he was just. My dad was. Whatever it was that could be sold, we were gonna sell it, you know what I mean? We sold hot dogs inside. We sold, you know, sodas, cold sodas. Outside we had watermelon, cantaloupe, flowers, all that. Like, this time of year, pumpkins and stuff would be all laid out. It's like our own little farmer's market, you know what I mean? And then we shut that up, shut that down. And by eight, nine o' clock in the evening, we was going to the nightclub that he owned, you know what I mean? Remind you, he had a sixth grade education.
And then there I was, the doughboy, the door boy. I had to do the one. I had to search people. I had to collect money. I was 13, I was maybe at that time probably about 15, 16 years old. But this is what I saw. A lot of people, they're like, that's not really a traditional upbringing, but it taught me a lot, you know what I mean? Now what people consider as hard work. Oh, I'm sorry I left this off during the summertime, I was working on his farm. He also had a farm. And so he was like, you want school shoes, you want school clothes or whatever? Be up some Monday morning at 7 o'.
[00:39:44] Speaker B: Clock.
[00:39:44] Speaker C: I was like 10 years old. That's what I was doing. So now what people bicker and complain
[00:39:49] Speaker D: about, oh, hard work.
[00:39:49] Speaker C: I'm like, man, I'm in ac, you know what I mean? I'm chilling. I get to get off. I get to go do my things with my kids. This ain't no hard work. I went from the convenience store to the nightclub. We shut that down at like 2:30 at the end of the night. And then that was that. I was at school Monday morning. And then sometimes I had to work for my school closer. So again, grandfather Faith, God, that relationship, which is very important. And then my dad taught me the same, but also too. I got to see him in real time, you understand what I'm saying? I got to see him grind and hustle and do what he do and do it with no excuse. Here I am with a college education and now working on the master's degree. What excuse do I have?
You understand what I'm saying? Those are the OGs to me, you know what I mean? I went to that little phase when I was a teen when I was looking at the D boys and stuff like that or whatever the case may be. And I was like, ah, that's kind of cool. But I knew I wanted more than that. And I knew what was already instilled in me. And I knew what solid men looked like. And then while my dad was doing all of this running two and three businesses and raising the family, he still was taking care of people in the community. My father was going cutting down trees. And when Hugo and stuff like that came, came through elderly people in the neighborhood, widdle widows and stuff like that, man, he was, he was over there, you know, making sure their, their, the trees are cut down in the yard, making sure they had groceries in their house. He was that type of man. He was. He just wherever he needed to be. He was a gap filler.
[00:41:11] Speaker B: So let me ask y' all fellas a question, man. Cause it seemed like the men that the OGs that y' all had coming up, man, thank God for the OGs that y' all had because y' all were some outstanding men, man, on the left and right side of me, you know what I'm saying?
[00:41:28] Speaker C: Appreciate it.
[00:41:29] Speaker B: My question is the things that they taught y', all, and both y' all have sons including me.
Do y'. All. You model the same thing they taught y', all, and you implement it with your sons, or you kind of scale back because some stuff. Probably.
I might leave that one out or.
You know what I'm saying? Like, you know, but the reason why I asked that question is because y'. All. I'm looking at y'. All.
Y' all some great men, you know what I'm saying? So apparently it worked, right?
[00:42:05] Speaker D: Yep. But it costs two, though.
It costs two. One thing that I'll say, I. It's not everything, but you know how you say you don't throw the baby away with the bath water. You don't take away the me, Throw away the bones. It's that kind of thing.
[00:42:19] Speaker B: Well, you got that from OG right there, boy.
[00:42:24] Speaker D: That's the first of me.
[00:42:26] Speaker C: Take it with the meat.
[00:42:27] Speaker D: Throw away the bones, bro. You know, so what worked back then wouldn't work now. Even my dad tell me, like, man, I know y' all thought y' all was hard. We was hard on. I said, man, it ain't no thought. Ain't no thought. Y' all were hard on us.
[00:42:42] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:42:42] Speaker D: But I understand it. I understand why it was necessary.
But also, it's new ways and doing things. And another thing that we all know is different ways to skin a cat. Absolutely.
[00:42:56] Speaker B: It is.
[00:42:57] Speaker D: It's different ways to scan the cat. So you can. You can teach the same lesson.
Not as extreme, but also have. Have that lesson still abide with you.
But you just have to take the time to consider, like, man, how would you know the younger person? Or my son, for example, or younger. Younger men, how would they take to the information? Because, man, it was only one way when we was growing up.
[00:43:23] Speaker C: That's it. It was only one way. That's it.
[00:43:25] Speaker B: One way.
You're right about that. Yeah.
[00:43:28] Speaker D: As much you said it's different ways to skin the cat, it was still that one way to do it.
[00:43:32] Speaker C: That's right.
[00:43:34] Speaker D: And now we have many, many different avenues of learning and really, really learning about us, learning about how we are, how we kind of have to reflect on how we felt when we got that information. To us, even though it worked, it's like, man. Like, man, did it take all that?
Did it really take all that?
[00:43:59] Speaker B: In their mind, it probably did.
[00:44:01] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:44:01] Speaker A: For real.
[00:44:01] Speaker D: But we can't blame them in the same. Because, like, they're a product of their.
[00:44:07] Speaker C: There you go.
[00:44:08] Speaker D: Their father's product of their father. Like, I'm a fourth generation, and the way they talk about my great granddaddy Like, I've known my great granddaddy, but he was always older, but he was like, man, when your great granddaddy was young, he was like, hey, that man was.
That man was tough, bro. Like, he ain't played.
But I never experienced that, but I always heard the stories and the same way with my granddad, his son. So I feel like every generation, it progresses forward a little. Certain things drop off.
[00:44:42] Speaker B: There you go.
[00:44:43] Speaker D: Certain things drop off, man. So I'm excited to see what he picks up and, you know, kind of changes. Because that's the heir. Yeah, I'm the present heir, but he's the one that's coming after me.
[00:44:56] Speaker B: Right, right.
[00:44:56] Speaker D: So after a while, the family gonna be looking at him for what's the move gonna be in regards to the legacy of the family? So I have to do what's necessary to show him, like, hey, it doesn't have to be this way. And I want you to use your own mind to curate how you want things to be for yourself, first and foremost.
[00:45:18] Speaker B: What is the legacy?
Like, I know each man have a different idea of his family, you know what I'm saying? And whatever that is and whatever the end goal is, that would probably be tied to his legacy, you know what I'm saying? Do y' all fellas have that image in mind?
Because a man.
A man should always think a little far ahead, for sure, you know what I'm saying? Because he, like, the quarterback, you know what I'm saying?
So, you know, he see things that the offensive line don't really see, you know what I'm saying? Offensive line is for me, maybe the kids, wife, whatever. Not that necessarily blocking for me, but he basically is seeing things, and he have to have a level of hindsight, too, you know what I'm saying? But I would say, what is that legacy for y'? All? You know what I mean? Cause y' all have beautiful families, man. And I know, you know, y' all got an end game of.
The word is.
What's the.
The. The madness? Well, how do they say it? The.
The means to your madness.
[00:46:36] Speaker A: And you.
[00:46:36] Speaker B: Your method. Your method to your madness of why y' all do what y' all do and what y' all see. Because your spouse, significant others may not understand.
[00:46:46] Speaker D: Absolutely.
[00:46:47] Speaker B: You know what I'm saying?
[00:46:48] Speaker D: So I'm gonna let Bill answer that.
I'm gonna let Bill answer that one.
[00:46:53] Speaker C: Well, my son. I'm named after my father.
My son is named after me.
[00:46:58] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:46:58] Speaker C: Okay. So back to what I was saying earlier about. I Was like, I'm a 20, 26 version of a Roosevelt, you know what I mean? My dad was his version. I was raised by baby boomers, you know what I'm saying? They were different kind of men, you understand what I'm saying? They were different.
There's a lot that I can again, that I can pick from them as far as like raising the kid and this, that the third.
I can't raise my son necessarily the way that my dad raised me. It's just different times. My coaches, I love them dearly. I had great coaches, I had a good professor, but they were the way they talked to us and stuff. It could fly. Then they came with a fly. Now, you know, people believe in like soft parenting, you know, my coaches and stuff, man, when I was a, a little guy, they used to talk to us in a certain way that was, you know, it'll make some people, you know, it'll make them fret now, you know what I mean? But it built me up. So now, like I said, I feel like it made me a certain kind of man, you understand, to be who I am today. So certain things don't move me to the left or to the right, you know. But at the end of the day, man, I'm not expecting to be my dad exactly. I'm not expecting Roosevelt III to be me exactly. For me as far as legacy and what I want to see, I want to see him just be the best version of Roosevelt that we've seen on this earth yet. You know what I mean? He shouldn't be my daddy.
He don't need to be me, you understand what I'm saying? I'm still a man that's working on himself, you know what I mean?
I'm a student of life. But what I'm seeing in him right now, I'm so proud because he's having conversations and stuff that I wouldn't have ever thought of when I was his age. So I feel like he's already on the path to what I want to see in him. You understand what I'm saying? So for me, it's just a better version, the third edition Roosevelt, you know what I mean? One that will be a provider that's going to be a Protestant. So here's the thing. The. Everything is still the same, right? I still want to see a provider in him. I want to see a protector in him. I want to see a stand up man in him. I want to see a man that's going to be a leader in the community.
It ain't about him going, oh, I want to see my son go play in the NFL. I want to see him do, you know, all these other great things or whatever, money wise or whatever. I want to see him be a stand up man, a Roosevelt, that is my wife. Have you seen like the, the phrases on the shirts, my ancestors wildest dreams. I want him to be our wildest dream, you know what I mean? So everything I'm doing now, you know, like I said, my son now seeing me again, I'm not just dad, I'm not just a provider, I'm not just a protector. Now he's seeing me as a student, you know what I mean, Here I am, you know, an adult and I'm helping him with his work. And now I'm back in school myself, you know, I want him to see me doing that and say, you know what, I wanna, you know, I wanna meet that standard, you know what I mean? And also push past that. Like I was saying, like I saw the stuff in my dad. So to me it's like grind is a must. I gotta go, you know what I mean? I got it. My dad didn't have the opportunity. If my dad had opportunities, I would have had, man, God forbid what he could have, what he could have accomplished, what he could have done. But he left his mark here, right? He left his mark on me. So my thing is I want to take that and put it on to my son. As far as raising him, I can't raise him the same way my dad raised me, but I want to put in him, if it's not broke, don't try to fix it. My dad did it with me, I'm gonna do it with him. But I'm gonna do the 2026 version of it and I'm gonna meet him where he is based on his personality, the way his mind operate, the way his spirit is. My son different man, you know what I mean? That boy, he, I mean, you know, most kids a lot of times video games at Internet and stuff like that. My son, you want to read a devotional, you know what I'm saying? Like he asks thought provoking questions and things like that, you know what I'm saying? So I gotta feed that. I was a kid, I was just all like, I need to be outside, I need to be playing some sports, I need to be fishing, I need to be running around, I need to be doing managed boy stuff, you know what I'm saying? But for him, he's more like, I see, like, I see the bloodline, like get better. And I'm so excited about that.
[00:50:59] Speaker B: I'm glad you said that.
[00:51:00] Speaker C: So excited about that.
[00:51:01] Speaker B: I'm glad you said about the bloodline is because my granddad always used to say that each generation gets smarter, they get better. You know what I'm saying? And I was that generation that he was talking about during that time, and now I got another level generation. You know what I'm saying? Yes, sir. Right behind me. Absolutely. But. But the thing is, it's such a blessing to see your kids not doing the same thing that you do. Yes, sir. But it's like they ahead.
Like, not only just ahead, but literally, man, like, boy, you, like, 15 years ahead.
And that right there definitely is a legacy to smile upon, you know what I'm saying? For real.
[00:51:45] Speaker D: And it's a testament.
[00:51:46] Speaker B: Yeah. It's definitely a testament to your growth. Yeah.
[00:51:50] Speaker D: And your evolution.
[00:51:52] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:51:53] Speaker D: As a man. Because like my son tell me all the time, man, dad, I want to be smart like you. I say, son, you already smarter than. Look at that.
[00:51:59] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:52:00] Speaker D: I said, man, the things that I learned. 30 years old, man. You learning right now.
[00:52:03] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:52:04] Speaker D: Imagine when you get to 30. 35. I'm 35. I like, man, like, like. Well, I'm excited, man, to just see what it will become in the future.
And what I want him to know in regards to legacy is it doesn't have to be anything that's material necessarily. Those things are important. But generational wealth doesn't stop and start with your resources. It starts with your mindset.
[00:52:38] Speaker C: Absolutely.
[00:52:39] Speaker D: How you connect with your community and provide for. For. For your family.
Those are things that are generational as well, and those are things that you're implementing and those things you're talking about as well. So I don't want us to get as. As community in the mindset of man, like, oh, man, we gotta have money. Da, da, da, da, da. We gotta have this and that, man. It's just a way of being and improve and build on that. And what I'm dealing with right now is trying to carry that mount because the mantle is heavy, man.
It's so heavy.
And it's almost like, man, how can I do this, man? It's a lot. But when you can look back and look back to. To the ones that came before you, I think it's a quarter says we're standing on the shoulders of those before us.
So we can always look back and see, man, if they could do it. I have that same bloodline.
I come from that same gene pool.
[00:53:47] Speaker B: Right, right.
[00:53:48] Speaker D: And Always say, man, I come from good stock.
[00:53:50] Speaker C: That's right.
[00:53:51] Speaker D: This good stock right here.
[00:53:54] Speaker B: You said you was about to say something.
[00:53:55] Speaker A: Yeah, I was just gonna say, like, I think that with the disconnect, a lot of times is all of you have said, my kid's gonna be smarter than me because I'm gonna teach them things that I know. Now then.
And some of the things you learned came from a number of different ways. One, seeing your dad do it.
[00:54:12] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:54:12] Speaker D: Or not do it.
[00:54:14] Speaker A: And that was my next time.
[00:54:15] Speaker C: Seeing your dad not do it.
[00:54:18] Speaker B: Yeah. That's fast.
[00:54:19] Speaker A: Then there was stuff you saw your dad do, like. I don't know.
[00:54:22] Speaker B: I don't know about that.
[00:54:23] Speaker A: You know, and then some was trial and error for sure, that you had to go through.
But you've always tried to. I think what we try to do, what the majority of us, I would like to think as black men, of course, is go, okay, well, how can I give my kid this jump start, this push forward that I didn't have?
And like, for me, with my son, my son could sit here and produce anybody's podcast.
[00:54:46] Speaker D: Nice.
[00:54:47] Speaker A: He can edit anybody's podcast. He can edit his own. He has his own podcast. He's decided that he didn't want to do it anymore, but he had his own podcast. And whenever he's ready to go back to it, he can. But he can sit here, record anybody. I could go outside, and he can handle everything.
He knows how to fix every piece of equipment in here, you know, if something goes wrong. Because I taught him that. And I was like, I had to go through all of this teaching myself that. So why wouldn't I give him this a skill that he can go back to.
When I had my clothing line, I walked him through everything.
He knows how to order, he knows how to press, he knows how to screen print.
Whatever I have done, I've taught him how to do. So now it's up to him. Like, now he wants to be a sports.
What's it called? Sports. Athletic trainer. I said, well, why not be an orthopedic surgeon?
Yeah, you could be around. You could be around sports.
But when my doctor told me that every time I canceled, it cost him $20,000 when I canceled. When I canceled my surgery three times, he said, I've already costed him $60,000. So I'm like, if I cost you 60,000 when I don't show up, how much are you making when I do,
[00:55:53] Speaker D: when I show up?
[00:55:54] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:55:56] Speaker A: So I said, you could be A sports doctor just dealing in orthopedics and make money. So now he's interested in that. So I think that what you guys are doing is what most guys should be doing, which is instilling what you know into the kids so that they have the knowledge going in. Okay, well, let me.
I seen my dad. Kind of. Rather than watching them mess you up or whatever, or having to learn on their own, you're giving them some type of skills that if the, if the chips ever go down, they have something they can go to and go. Like, if my son ever. If he ever has nothing, he can go call. He can call up a podcast company. Hey, I know how to produce, I know how to edit, I know how to. He could go on fiverr and become an editor of a podcast.
[00:56:33] Speaker B: Yeah. Work in media.
[00:56:34] Speaker C: That's right.
[00:56:34] Speaker B: One of the things I really want to point out to all y' all guys, man, because Yusef said something about what his son can do. I know what your son can do. Know what your son can do. The thing, the most important thing is because you can have the dream for your child depending on where they want to go at, but to get that motor for them to go, that comes in a hard work. Like, if you willing to do the work, like, you can be whoever.
Whoever you want to do, whatever. You know what I'm saying? But, man, do you have the. The work ethics and what y' all showing them is the work ethic.
[00:57:12] Speaker C: Yeah, that's kind of what I was. I was liking what he was saying, like how he. He want his son to tag along with everything.
[00:57:19] Speaker B: Right, Right.
[00:57:19] Speaker C: Like I said, I love that a lot. And back to what I was saying, like, you know, sometimes I go and I train with clients. So my son see that. So give you a quick example. So our family, we was. We. We've recently purchased some land, Right?
[00:57:32] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:57:32] Speaker C: And so we see this. This is going to be a thing that's going to be in my family for generations and generations to come. Okay. And so right now, you know, I said, I'll be a future farmer. Right. And so I'm in the process of learning about farming.
[00:57:43] Speaker D: I'm not no farmer.
[00:57:44] Speaker C: I didn't grow up on the farm or any of that. You know what I mean? Well, I was saying, like, my dad had a farm, but I mean, we were out picking, you know, he. He grew crops while picking crops. But I've never, you know, deal that did it on my own or managed a farm or anything on my own. So now with this family land that we have. It's just raw land.
It's a lot of land. I gotta learn. I gotta learn how to manage that land. But my goal and my plan is to take my son with me on the journey as I learn, so we can learn together, so we can grow together. He can see dad putting in the work. He can put in the work, and we can learn and grow together. And my thing, my hope is that I could pick up something that I can show him and also, too, he'll get it and do it bigger and do it better, and then it'll continue on as the family generations go on.
[00:58:26] Speaker D: But he'll turn around and show you something.
[00:58:27] Speaker C: There it is. We learn it together.
[00:58:30] Speaker B: Listen, man. Cause I was getting ready to go into something else. Cause I was getting ready to ask y' all boys, and maybe we can close it off.
[00:58:38] Speaker D: Close it off.
[00:58:39] Speaker B: I was getting ready.
What's a line that you heard growing up, man?
Like, y' all talk about your OG that you hear. Like, for me, my OG was my granddaddy, you know, and one of his things was he always to say is said, son, that why God gave you two ears and one mouth, because he intend for you to listen more than you talk. You know what I'm saying? Because I used to always be, like, cutting them off. You know what I'm saying? You gotta listen.
I can see that. I can see that.
I like to cut them off, but. And I still haven't 100% learned it. You know what I'm saying? I've mastered it, but I'm still learning, though. So what's some lines, man, y' all wanna leave?
[00:59:23] Speaker D: Yeah, like, hey, man, I mean, I got a couple, but one for sure. She said that.
[00:59:27] Speaker B: Hey, man.
[00:59:29] Speaker D: My granddaddy and my dad would always say, hey, man, use your head for something other than a hat rat.
[00:59:34] Speaker B: Yeah, that's another line my granddad usually
[00:59:39] Speaker D: Use your head, man. Use that tool in between your two shoulders, man.
[00:59:43] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:59:44] Speaker D: And not just to put something on it, man. Put something in it.
[00:59:47] Speaker C: Put something in it.
Mine actually came from a great professor, Mr. Myers.
Rest in peace. Mr. Myers State University, one of the greatest professors ever. He has such a great impact on my life and the. The line that he gave me, man, I never forget this will go with me to the grave. Good times never pay no bills.
Good times never pay no bills. Mr. Myers, South Carolina State Bulldogs, indeed. Good times never pay no bills.
[01:00:13] Speaker D: Gotta let that so Bulldog.
[01:00:14] Speaker C: Yes, sir.
[01:00:16] Speaker B: Ah, there we go. Hey, listen, man, if y' all made it towards the end I appreciate y', all, man. Do me a favor. Once you subscribe, share this episode with somebody. Man. Listen, it got two of the greatest guys on. On the side of me, man, that putting out gems. And I want to leave y' all with Scripture. Proverbs 27:17. Iron, sharp and iron. So a man sharpened the continents of his friends.
Remember, heads high, crowns higher. King me.
